A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I know this is a little long but please read. This guy has been so confusing lately. It all started in the summer when I told him I liked him. He said he wanted to get to know me more and just stay friends, but that a relationship was a possibility in the future. At the time, he liked a girl from out of town, but she was still getting over her ex boyfriend. This girl pretty much led him on because she said things might change if they could hang out in person. He never had a chance to hang out with her either because she was always busy. He liked her all through fall, but around Thanksgiving he said he was tired of waiting for her to be ready for a relationship. As his friend, I was there to tell him that she wasn't worth it anyways and that there are more fish in the sea. Then, in the hopes that maybe he liked me, I brought up the topic of a relationship happening between us. He said I'm a great girl with good morals and values, and I'm a lot of fun to be around, but the reason he couldn't like me as more than a friend was because it was weird when we hung out. That hurt me, so I slowly started to let go and move on. Right before Christmas, he said he thought he was starting to like this girl from his church. Again, as his friend I supported him and I encouraged him to ask her out. At that point I was almost completely over him. On New Year's Eve, I even told him that I didn't like him anymore. About a week ago, we went to our school winter formal as friends, and we slow danced a few times. He even came over to me real close during a fast song and we started grinding. He also called me pretty for the first time ever that night. We were texting the other night, and he called me pretty again! In this same conversation, I brought up the girl he liked from his church. He said she won't give him a second glance, and he has to drag the conversation on when he talks to her, so it's not worth it to like her. I guess he was feeling kind of down because he said in this world most girls won't give him a second glance. I said looks don't matter and I thought that personality was the most important thing. Then he said he wished more girls would think that. So my question is what's his deal? Does he like me now or does he still think of me as a friend? I think I'm maybe starting to like him again, but I don't want to waste my time and go back and set myself up to get hurt. Please give me your advice and opinions. And sorry that this was so long! Thanks in advance :D
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female
reader, TheRabbit +, writes (15 January 2009):
 This man sounds like he's in a state of self pity and is trying to take it out on you. You were and are a very devoted and supporting friend to him and it seems he is trying to manipulate your feelings for him to his own advantage. Or perhaps he is looking to you as affirmation for his own self-confidence. But it is very unlikely that he is considering a real relationship with you.
And ask yourself this. If you were to get into a relationship with him, do you think he would stay true to you, if say one those other girls suddenly started giving him more attention?
This guy sounds like he's out for his own interests and not yours.
So take his compliment for what it was, a compliment, and nothing more. You deserve better and shouldn't have to play his mind games.
A
female
reader, Ask JenniHearts  +, writes (15 January 2009):
 he might be just messing with your head but theres a strong possibility that he may like you
but on the other hand alot of my guy friends tell me how pretty i look or complament me i guess i'd have to know how he acts around everyone to really say...
hope this helps
jenni hearts
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A
female
reader, loveonly71606 +, writes (15 January 2009):
OK, here's the deal. Taking into consideration on what you said, It seems like he wants to get close to you but he might be afraid of losing what's already there. He know's he can count on you for advice and as someone to be there for him in a time of need. But you need to take the upper hand. Ask him. Would you like to take this relationship to another level, or are we going to just remain friends. If by chance he says friends, the lessen the time that you hang out with him. Hopefully one day he will come around, then again it may be too late. She can not put your life on hold for anyone. Especially for something you are not sure of.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2009): well just lay low for a while.. if he likes you then he'll come to you. don't let yourself get those feelings back unless you know he likes you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2009): Well to start with I don't think you should –if you can help it anyway– go back to liking him, if he doesn't like you back its probably not worth it to get you're hopes up then let them fall again. Other then that, wait until he actually tells or gives a very un-vague hint that he likes you. Until then, like you said 'there's a whole lot of fish in the sea'. (you said that right?)
•ºSavannah•º
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