A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I just need some clarity without judgment, please! I've known this guy for about five years and over the last couple of years, we've been hanging out a lot. NOT dating; just hanging out and being great friends. Now, I've always been into British men; I've always wanted to go to England, find myself a nice English chap and get married and have proper little children.Well, my friend grew up in the middle of nowhere and was raised by parents who also grew up in the middle of nowhere. He's a country boy and according to him, he's proud of it. And that's where all of this truly began. He's introduced me to a lot of country music, he sings and plays guitar himself, and he's a right gentleman. He even owns a Chevy truck and has that Southern drawl. I'm from the city and I never thought I'd even be friends with someone from the South. I hope that doesn't make me sound prejudice! It's just something I never thought would happen considering I am from the city.Anyways, this is where my confusion lies: He's always trying to touch me in some way or another. His friends tell me he constantly talks about me and my friends keep asking me why I'm not dating him cause he's so nice. But never, in the last five years we've known each other, have we talked about being in a relationship. Well, I mean, a few months ago, we talked about it in a very hypothetical sense but that's it! And he's the one who brought it up!When I'm feeling down about something, he gives up everything to help me back up. He doesn't buy me gifts, he makes them for me and cooks for me. My two cats completely love him and my parents think he's a "very nice boy" and apparently his parents think relatively the same way about me. We've gotten into arguments over the last couple of years about the men I've dated in the past and how apparently, I deserve better. My friend is a very good-looking guy and when he wears a cowboy hat, I do sometimes wish for something naughty but I just don't know.Am I just being stupid to it all? I'm not very privy to most flirtatious behaviors considering I suck at flirting but just writing this now, it seems kind of obvious. His behavior would certainly make sense if he DID have feelings for me. Please clear this up for me (without judgment). Thanks!
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female
reader, AnneRose  +, writes (13 May 2011):
 I think I know what you are feeling...
I think its normal that when you are presented with such a wonderful man you question yourself but , if you are sure you just want to be friends with him , then just stay friends with him... but I know that there is a part of you that desires someone a litle more.... bad!
But belive me , if you are just looking for someone BAD then don't complaint when he gets another girl and you're still stuck with those one night stands for the rest of your life...
I know it feels weird right now but just try to be with him, becouse a big part of you wants that and you might regret latter.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (13 May 2011):
 Let me ask you this, if he WAS interested in you, what would your response be? My guess is he likes you a lot but is being a gentleman and allowing you to look for your city slickers. Maybe he's hoping that when you've had your heart broken enough, you'll finally take notice of him.
If you are interested, why don't you start giving him some signals and see where they lead?
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A
male
reader, a-g55 +, writes (13 May 2011):
 Take a risk, Pull the trigger.
go for it
sounds like he likes you to me
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (13 May 2011):
 You do know we have cities in the South filled with city girls, right?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2011): it's pretty obvious. he likes you. he is just too much of a gentleman to come right out and say it, or to push it physically, as many of the city dwelling folks are wont to do. that is part of being from the south (or really anywhere that isn't a city) where manners, friendliness, and genuine helpfulness are valued above the conniving, ruthless nature so prevalent in society today.
you do come off as a bit prejudiced, but it may be simply that you don't realize that most of the country is like this - only a few cities of people who arent...
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