A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:So i'll start from the beginning. we met through the internet... sounds dubious. i wasn't sure about it myself either... but we did have mutual friends in the real world so it made it a little easier to connect with each other.we hadn't met but we would talk regularly which made it very easy for us to like each other. eventually after quite a struggle, we decided to be a couple (struggle because firstly I didn't think it was rational to get into a long distance relationship,secondly we hadn't even met, thirdly he wasn't quite my type. but he gave an ultimatum - all or nothing, so i agreed)we had a lot of problems even before the relationship started. i was innocently talking to my ex .. but i didn't tell him he was my ex.. so later when he came to know.. he was seriously mad... and that ex of mine suppossedly talked with him via the internet.. and i don't know what went down.. but then my bf became cruel, mean, started talking to another girl over the net... blah blah blah.so then the problems started... i found out he was flirting with that girl, i confronted him... but refused to give up on the relationship.. because we hadn't even met then.. so i thought after we meet things would be different.so we met, and started going out like a normal couple, but then again we had disagreements.. and I see him talking to the same girl again over the net. So I confront him.. and all he says is that he had problems with me and was talking to her about it !!!!!! ha haso i broke up with him.. and suddenly the same girl's relationship status is in a relationship.. i figured it could be him but didn't try to find out.3 months later he calls me up again.. because he is sorry. and his GF also calls me up cause he broke up with her.... so I stop talking with him... again he calls me up... I try and reason with him .. ask him for an explanation.. but he has nothing.. so i tell him to leave me alone..he stays quiet for a few days/weeks then again calls me up... once cause his grandmother had expired.. I tell him I'm sorry but not to call me up.. but he does..now he is in another country and after a gap of about a month or two he again called me up... from there.So I go and see his facebook account... and I see he has been talking to that girl.. and could have possibly been in a relationship the whole time he was calling me up..she had his pictures on her profile display...I am sad and pissed off.. and frustrated...I don't understand what he is doing.. If he loves me why the hell is he hurting me this way... and if he is not why is he calling me up..I am so tired and stressed and strained out becos of this... I want to get on with my life, start a new relationship, just move on.. but him appearing like this, when he actually maybe in a relationship with that girl is just pissing me off....I have feelings for him, but zero inclination to act on it. i despise him for what he did, and want him to disappear from my life.. and just give me a break.at times i get this incredible urge to just out him in front of this - "girlfriend or whatever she is is".I get a strange satisfaction when I think about doing it.So what do I do? why is he doing this, calling me up? Did he ever love me? should I out him to his girlfriend? and just mess up his life...
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a break, broke up, facebook, flirt, grandmother, move on, my ex, the internet Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2013): I am the OP of this question, thank you for the replies.
the thing is, I hadn't even kissed a guy before him. and I kinda made out and stuffs with him. And these things are stuck with me now.
I am not someone who can get physical easily, so the thought of being with someone new is kinda freaking me out.
sometimes I think it was my fault too, but I don't know how any of it can be fixed, now that things have become soooo... messed up.
I just want to forget about him, The girl he is currently dating knew he was with me when she started flirting with him, so I know how she is.
I just can't believe he just betrayed me in such a manner... it sucks... anyways that's where I'm at.
A
female
reader, Abella  +, writes (18 January 2013):
 his EGO still wants to check if you miss him, feel jealousy about him and still want him back. He still thinks he could get you back, but only to toy with you.
What a deluded immature shallow man. Who would want him?
He's hardly a prize.
Your problem is not with the other girl. Don't try to hurt, by saying something. She will learn, if she does not know already, what he is.
She and you have a lot in common. Both of you have fallen for a silly petty young man who is yet to grow up.
The problem is him.
Block him, change your cell phone no.
Don't go on the same sites as him. Check all the privacy settings possible in Facebook so that he can't see your posts nor your photo nor your friends.
Be thankful that you broke up with him.
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A
female
reader, Agneta  +, writes (18 January 2013):
 I am sad this happened to you, you have been treated very badly and it is good you understand this and want to go on finding someone better for you. You must not reply more to his messages and not check his Facebook status. That will just upset you and make it harder. If you stop responding to him he must eventually give up and leave you alone. I understand why you want to out him, you want him to suffer like you do, but in the long run I don't think anybody gets happier by getting back or having revenges. It might even actually hurt you. My advice on this would be to leave it and let him sort his own mess out. You are not the only one, I am sure. He will have this problems anyway, creating them all by himself. You r best revenge will be to soon be far away from him, happy not thinking of him even a slightly tiny little bit. Best of luck, girl!
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