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female
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*$~~~shorty~~~$$
writes: I don't know what to do. I'm going out with my best friend and weve been going out for 2 weeks. I cheated on him a week ago with his friend and I had a big crush on him and now it hurts me to even look at my boyfriend cause I made a mistake. And not only that, I might be pregnant by his friend. What do I do?
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reader, becky05 +, writes (26 July 2005):
First, you must find out if you are pregnant or not.
If you are and you are sure that this other man ids the father then you have to tell both him and your boyfriend.
It will not be easy but it is the right thing to do.
A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (24 July 2005):
 First, find out about the possibly pregnancy. You can go and get a test at a sexual health clinic (usually for free), or you can get one at the chemist. If you do it at home, read the instructions very carefully, so that you get a true result.
If you do turn out to be pregnant, that should become the focus of what you're doing right now. Skip thinking about any boyfriends for a while. You'll need to make an informed decision about what is the right action for you. Talk to the people at the sexual health clinic about referrals, and then ask as many questions or as many professionals as you can, so you can get enough information to decide about a termination, an adoption, keeping the baby, and any other options that they might know of. Whatever you decide has to be right for YOU, because you have to live with that choice.
Then - if you're pregnant and keeping the baby - you need to determine who the father is, (presuming you've had a sexual relationship with both of them). That means you have to tell both of them what happened and deal with the fallout. You'll have to get each to give a DNA sample, so the father can contribute to raising his child.
Things are simpler if you're not pregnant, however. You should (as recommended below) stay right away from the "friend", because he clearly isn't anybody's friend. He's a manipulative user of people.
You also need to think long and hard about how you feel about your "boyfriend" and whether you care about him enough to try to have a proper relationship with him. After all, if you were willing to go off and sleep with someone else after only a fortnight, how serious were you to begin with?
I suggest that your behaviour demonstrates that you're too emotionally immature to handle dating at this time of your life. It goes without saying - I'll say it anyway - but you're also NOT EQUIPPED for a sexual relationship with anyone if you're not forward thinking enough to always have your own contraception. No glove, no love, hon! Always. No exceptions.
Consider winding yourself back a bit and not being so free with the sex until your mind catches up with your body, OK? You'll save yourself a whole lot of trouble if you do.
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A
reader, HappyTimeHarry +, writes (24 July 2005):
The first thing you have to do is get over what happened as best you can. Life doesn't give a damn if you're hurt, if you made a mistake, or if you're lost. It goes on. As for your situation, it sounds very awkward and painful, but I will urge you one thing. Your boyfriend's friend is no good. He had no loyalty to his friend, and he will have none for you. Loyalty is the measure of a man, and he is proven worthless by what he did. STAY AWAY. Whatever you do about your baby, it would be the right thing to do to try to set things right with your bf even if he wants nothing to do with you. Be strong, and always get back up as many times as you fall.
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