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female
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*adamchops
writes: a couple of days ago i found out my boyfriend was all over and kissing a girl in a night club.ive sent him packing but the thing is this is massively life changing for me.we have been together for 3 years and have a daughter together and i do love him and very much want to keep our family together.if this was an isolated incident i could possibly put it down to drunken stupidness but he has cheated once before early on in our relationship and also does not always do what is best for us as a family.i feel lost without him and desperatly want to us to be a family and he says that he wants that too and doesnt know why he does these stupid things.should i take him back hoping that we can get through this and that it doesnt happen again or am i just kidding myself?
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female
reader, Virginiaac +, writes (21 December 2005):
Take care not to ditch this guy. He wants a family but is obviously immature. Fly into a rage when he steps out of line and let him know it and ensure he knows you will not stand for another silly action on his part.
Keep him out of mischief and he could prove to be a good husband and father.
A
female
reader, kellyO  +, writes (20 December 2005):
 You have caught him before and he has done it again i dont think he will change. Find a decent man who will be devoted to you and your kid. why should u even be missing him.If u insist u must go back at least make it tough on him a few days and that's it.
Take care and i sincerely wish u all the best.
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female
reader, candice001 +, writes (20 December 2005):
They say once a cheat always a cheat.
If he has done it before and you caught it again! I would stop it where it stands.
You should have stopped it the first time b-4 you made a child with this man. Now not only do you suffer your daughter will suffer as well.
I have no sympathy to a man who cheats. Their excuses mean nothing and their down the road. The first time should have been the last.
Sorry to be so blunt. I have no time for a lying cheating s.o.b. If you caught him 2x now. How many times didn't you catch him.
Do what is best for you and your child she should be first. I raised my child alone and I am proud to say she is great.
Dont put the child or yourself through this.
Stand your ground and if he can PROVE he is worthy of being a productive and positive provider and protector and a good male influance for both you and your child reconsider. Dont get your hopes up though.
I hope this helps. Good luck!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2005): how can you miss someone that is doing this to you?, this is a classic case of once a cheater always a cheater, he does not respect you and if he did he would not do stupid things like that, being drunk is no excuss, take your daughter and go find yourself a nice place to live and start your life over without him in it, sure keep your daugter in contact with him bu there is no reason why you should have too, you sound like a great person im sure it wont be long till you find someone else.
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A
female
reader, cridagus +, writes (20 December 2005):
i was in your shoes. I caught with my own eyes my then borfriend and father of an 8 month old making out with a girl in a bar. I really thought i was going to die. It is so hurtful. I really think if the both of you want to equally work things out than you two should start over. It is never to late. Start dating again get to really know eachother. You said he was in a club, does he have a drinking problem, mine did. You also need not be selfish you have a daughter and she needs a Mature father and how would he like some one doing that to his little girl. People say people do not change, my husband (then Boyfriend) is a different person now thatn he once was. If you love him don't give up on him. ou only know how you feel so do what is in your gut.
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