A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: i have two men in my life, tonny and Thomas, i have been with Tonny for over 5 years. i have known thomas for one year.we had problems with Tonny one year ago and thats when i met thomas. Thomas has been a very sweet man and he has asked me to marry him! unfortunately for me, when i told tonny about thomas and the decision i was about to make, he moved into my house and swore never to leave me! i told tonny i was in love with thomas wholly but he said since i had loved him before, i would gain the love with time.my problem now is that i want to move on with the man i love, only that all my friends, family, workmates know Tonny. his family members cherish me so much, and no one thinks i would have any reason to move on bse Tonny has been very supportive and loving. what should i do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2010): That is a very tricky question...Dont you think that the only reason you fell in love with Thomas is because you felt left out of Tonny's life?And therefore the only reason you Think you love Thomas is because he gives you the attention you desire and Tonny never gave to you in the past year or so...Maybe you should re-considder your decisions.Take the time to learn your heart and feelings,then you will be able to know if you realy love Thomas more than Tonny.Remenber true love never realy dies so if you think about the reason you fell in love with Thomas and turns out to be because of the loss of attention,then choosing Thomas might not be the right choise.Also remember you and Tonny need to be open,keep no secrets and tell him if you feel left out otherwise he wont know that's how you feel.
Hope you make the best decision for yourself and hope you wont break your own heart.Think carefully before you act.
A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (2 December 2010):
If you don't love Tonny anymore and you have not regained your feelings in one year, move on.
All your family ,friends and workmates know and love Tonny , and he might very well be objectively a great guy.
But it's not your family ,friends and workmates who would have to live with Tonny and have sex with him and maybe have children with him. That would be YOU. So the only opinion which really counts it's yours.
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