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male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I passed by our company during my vacation leave when I met this beautiful, smart, and interesting lady in our office (so far she is the most beautiful woman in our office). I successfully established communication with her through chat and text messages and she's cordially hospitable with me. Though there was an moment that she once ignored my call (maybe for the reason that she felt intimidated in one of my email wherein I told her my true feelings for her). Fortunately, after I've been able to talk to her again. I've been communicating with her for a month and a half now. We talk about work-related topics, movies, officemates, things we did this day, jokes, and sometimes religion. Sometimes I was able to compliment her and she giggles shyly in return. I've also learned things about her like her favorites, her family, and her past relationship. I felt great every phone conversation, and it strengthens my feelings for her because of she is nice and smart, although I can still sense her shyness.What concerns me is the guys in our office. Though I've been pulling off nice conversation with her in the phone, I'm a bit anxious on how the other guys doing. And since I'm a thousand miles away from our office, I'm feeling a bit worried because the other guys might have a better chance on her since they are physically there. I understand her if there are times that she can't reply in my chat messages during office hours. And after all, she has all the right to choose whom she thinks the best.Do I have a chance with her? Can you suggest me tips on how to raise my chances? One time we talk about the her suitors, she told me that most of the guys are only playing. But I really liked her and I'm committed to have a serious relationship with her if ever I win her heart (too bad I wasn't able to tell her because I fear she will be intimidated again).
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Beingblack  +, writes (29 October 2009):
 I get the impression that this woman has completely blown you away.
The trouble is that in this day and age, you have to be a little careful. You don't want to look like a stalker, or a pest, or a plain fool.
You work with this woman, so take precautions.
Personally, I would back off a little with telling her how you feel, those emails may come back to haunt you. Why not simply ask her out for lunch? If she says yes, see how it goes. If lunch goes well, ask for an out of office number.
If she says no to lunch, or refuses to give you her number, don't harass her, just move on.
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