A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have always thought that marriage is a really bad idea. I mean, almost every couple I know is just a disaster. Nothing ever seems to last - and personally, I know myself, and I know how impatient I am. I'm not made for it.But now I'm hopelessly, horribly in love. I've been in love with this woman for three years, and she loves me too, and we have a connection that only exists in bad movies. We know what the other is thinking, we adore each other on every level, we go from joking to conversation to teasing each other to whispering dirty things to debating about literature to sharing our deepest secrets, and everything is perfect. She feels like the other half of myself. We are very similar, and we see the world in same way. Not to mention that she's the most beautiful thing I ever saw. Our parents are delighted, everyone is happy for us.And she's popped the question. I really want to say yes, because I love her so much - and even given my impatience, how could I ever find someone else so perfect for me?But at the same time, I'm about to turn twenty-four, and even if the glow has lasted three years so far, what's to say things won't change? I'm sure I still have a lot of growing-up to do, and I don't want to let her down. I don't ever want to hurt her. So what should I do?(I know, gay marriage isn't even legal, but you know what we mean.)
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male
reader, jay12toes  +, writes (8 June 2008):
 ok if you want to be with her forever then you need to get married. are you so afraid that it wont work later on that you would ruin it now. im betting that you girlfriend wont want to be with someone who wont marry her which means if you decide that you never want to get married she will probably leave you. you love her and this is the first time youv even considerd getting married to someone right? so take a chance and hope that it dose last forever.
A
female
reader, pashanoodle  +, writes (8 June 2008):
 We all wish we could have a crystal ball and look into our futures...however wouldn't life be boring if we could!!!It's normal to feel a little apprehensive on the cusp of a big decision or a life changing event...and yep, a wedding fits that criteria! Yes, relationships change over time - but that doesn't have to be in a negative way....if you and your lady have the connection and deep love you describe it is my feeling that you have a very good foundation to base a future together on. You can "grow up" together....for like 60 years!!There is also so much positivity and support surrounding you...another very good sign! If your first thought was to say yes...then listen to that. If we never did anything because of the 'potential' to hurt or be hurt....we'd never live, just love her, cherish what the two of you have now and work together to build on that and keep it strong, if you can do that you have just as much right to a happy marriage as anyone does!
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