A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi there people,I was just wondering is it possible to meet your soul mate in school.I have been with my boyfriend 7 years (since we were 15). We have an amazing relationship i really couldnt complain. We both have good career paths hes a project managment apprentice in his final year and im a trainee accountant. We have a life together as well as seperate we both see our friends weekly sometimes we all meet up as group! i still maintain an amazing relationship with all my school friends. Me and him as a couple are like best friends with a great sex life i can count on one hand how many times weve argued. weree not engaged nor live together but we plan to travel next year. My problem is when my friends, mum or other people ask me if i see myself marrying this boy i say yes. to which they of snigger or patronise me. Also they tell me i need to sleep with more people as hes the only guy ive had sex with. but whats the point if im amazingly happy with him? ive never been the type to want to sleep around nor have i had the urge to cheat. I dont get it because they love him and us as a couple. 2 of my friends who are the same age are recently engaged and have been with thier respective partners less than 2 years and i was soo happy for them both. But just because i met my boyfriend 5 years earlier its like unbelievable to other people that i feel this way. im a realist i know we could break up next week but so could any couple! I just wanna know is it still possible in this day and age to meet so young and be happy.
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best friend, engaged, sex life, soul mates, soulmate Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2014): Hey just another thank you to the other people who have taken time to answer my query youve really made me feel alot better! I guess i was looking for reassurance there has to be some couples out there that do it right and i genuinley think we could and im sick of feeling dumb or nieve for feeling this way if I/we didnt we may aswell break up now! once again thank you so much guys!!!!
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (22 October 2014):
 That's a bit like asking : do people really win the lottery ? Do people really survive a shark attack ?
Of course they do ! Just... not many, really.
I don't think people are really sniggering or patronising you- they just can't help being realistic, that's all.
I don't know about UK, but for USA, there are scientific studies about everything :), there's one dated 2006 which say that only 2% of new marriages in North America happen between high school sweethearts ( which is telltale in itself ). Of these though, only a very LOW percentage makes it to the ten years mark- actually,the incidence of divorce is remarkably HIGHER compared to national average , for people who married their childhood sweethearts as compared to those who meet their half apple, say, after college. ( And that, in a country where divorce rate is per se disquietingly high in general ).
So, it's not quite true to say that you could split up next week "like anybody else ". Statistically speaking, you are more vulnerable. ( Statistics are notoriously unromantic ).
Can you beat the odds ? sure you can. Do your mom, family and friends hope that you beat the odds ? I bet they do- same as we people at DC.
Can you be sure you have met "the one" just because you got together at 15 and have lasted 7 years so far ?... No way- don't count on that.
I guess that 's all they mean. No more and no less.
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A
male
reader, dougbcoll  +, writes (22 October 2014):
 marry the one you can't live without, not some guy you think you can live with. you know what you have together with your boy friend don't let jealous friends ect... do damage to your relationship because they will. "also they tell me i need to sleep with more people as hes the only guy i have had sex with." some people are not happy unless they can have a hand in other peoples lives weather for the good or for the bad. they will mess up a good thing you two have by destroying what you two have that they don't. they may mean well , but the advice for you to sleep around is advice from fools, that will do damage to what you have now. i met my wife when she was 16, we have been married 31 years now. it is possible to find the one in life at a early age. my uncle and aunt just celebrated their 50th wedding, they married when she was 15. just something to think about. it sounds like you two have a lot going for each other. don't let bad advice from relative' and friends do you in.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2014): I'm not sure how to verify my answer! but thank you all so much for your answers they have really helped and im greatful
for the time you took out of your day to answer. I think all i needed was some reassurance im not mad! haha. Once again thanks guys!!!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2014): Makes no sense. Of course you don't need to have sex with other people to know that you're happy!
It may be a possibility to them that you'll get bored with only one person your entire life, but no one knows how you feel except you. I think it's entirely possible you meet someone who is perfect for you at a young age. Most people who date young grow apart as they grow up, but it seems like you and your boyfriend grew up to fix each other even more. I say rock on and be happy! Ignore the nay-sayers.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (21 October 2014):
 So, let's see. someone suggests you need to have sex with more than your bf before you'll know if he's the right one. If you carry that logic to it's conclusion you'll never marry him you'll just keep having sex with more and more peoplr until you find the right one. Talk about "catch 22" let me guess, the one who told you that was a guy?
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (21 October 2014):
 why not?
my grandparents met in an orphanage when they were 10 and 12.
The did not marry till nearly age 30 which was considered old in the late 1920's early 30s...
they were married 67 years.... and died less than a year apart.
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A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan +, writes (21 October 2014):
I’m afraid people can be narrow-minded sometimes and assume their path to happiness is the path everyone should take. Perhaps for them, it did take having sex with a few people, or a few bad breakups for them to figure out what they wanted, how they saw their future and to meet the right person. I wonder if they’re slightly envious that you’ve apparently got it so right first time around. I’m not sure why because it’s down to luck really, if the right person comes in to your life sooner rather than later, even if you can choose to make the most of that luck or not. I don’t think people are trying to upset you, sometimes we reject what we don’t understand, and perhaps they don’t understand how you can feel so self-assured with your first and only serious partner. But this doesn’t mean they’re right to cast doubt or act dismissively in this way, and I’d suggest that you keep in mind the fact that you are your own best judge in this situation. Everyone has opinions, everyone gives advice, but ultimately we make our own decisions and our own choices, based ultimately on our own judgements. So be happy, don’t let it make you feel insecure, and remember that, although you’re both pretty lucky, your situation isn’t at all abnormal or something to worry about. Good luck to you both. A lovely good news story, thanks for sharing it.
I wish you all the very best.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (21 October 2014):
 If you need someone to give you the optimism, I will give it to you. I was born the last year of generation X and you are from generation Y. I hear a lot of things about how young people don't know how to love anymore but I still believe in it. I am never one to be dissuaded by current trends or statistics. My sexual partner count is close to 20 and while I don't regret my choices I never felt like I needed different men for comparison. You should always be aware that friends and family are some of the biggest influence and why relationships break up. I would say it's helpful to move away and never look back. So in 30 years time with grown up children you won't be tempted to look up old school classmates. To make sure you don't become another one having an affair with an old high school crush, just don't do it. Don't look at facebook or whatever social media will be popular then. A lot of times people use the "I've never been with anyone else" as an excuse to exit the relationship. If you get to the stage when you want to marry your boyfriend, have him make a solemn promise he won't ever pull that. You also make a promise you won't.
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