A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:i am pre-menopausal for several years and maybe 1 period a year and my new companion is shooting blanks can i get pregnant. i am 40 he is 48thanks
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2010): I think its ridiculous to say its selfish to have children at the age of 40, there are no guarantees in life, I lost both my parents when I was 18, and I wouldnt have changed the time I had with them for the world, I still had to become a young women and face all my years ahead without them, but they loved me and were everything to me, dont listen to the previous post about being 40 being to old.
I didnt get the chance to see mine grow old, they both died so young.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2010): If you are serious about getting pregnant, and you have issues, please go see a gyno that specialized in fertility issues.
My aunt was 41 when she had her first child due to medical issues. A fertility clinic was able to identify the problems, address them, and in time bring about a successful pregnancy with a 100% healthy child (it took about 2 years).
In my opinion, real issues of fertility can only be corrected by real medical professionals. If you are serious about getting pregnant, even at your age, please get your health evaluated by professionals, and dont give up too easily when things dont work out the first few tries (some fertility treatments require a few attempts). Good Luck. Hope things work out for you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2010): Yes, you can get pregnant - but not by your husband - and you'd need to have sex just about every day of the year with someone who is not firing blanks. Might take a few years, but it's possible - just!
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A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (30 June 2010):
 By the sounds of things the chances of you getting pregnant if he is infertile and you having a period once a year are pretty slim.
But then again why do you want to get pregnant? To be honest it is a bit selfish having a baby after 40, especially with your partner being 48. The child will not have its parents in its life for very long and surely neither of you will be able to keep up with a young toddler, running around, playing in the park....I dont want to sound harsh but really I dont think it is the best for a child to have parents that are over 40, they miss out on so much in life.
I only say this from experience - my best friend's parents are a fair bit older than all of her friends parents. Her mum was 42 when she had my friend, and her dad must have been about 46-50. When her dad would pick her up from school the kids would tease her saying "oh is that your grandad here to pick you up?" - she would be so upset and cry every time. Now despite only being 23 her parents are in very poor health as they are both mid to lates 60's, her mum has had a stroke and my friend has to care for her a lot of the time. Her dad has chronic arthritis and cannot move around very easily. All this before she is even 25! So at her age when she should be having the time of her life she is having to care for her elderly parents, obviously she does not mind doing it because she loves them but she does wish she could be more like her "normal" friends who can go out and do as they please without worrying about their parents. I am the same age as her and my parents are only early 50's, and I am thankful I dont have the constant worry about their health hanging over me.
So I think by the sounds of things getting pregnant for you is going to be very hard - nature has pretty much decided your time for children has passed, and on top of that I think you should think very seriously about what kind of life you would be giving this child, and whether it really is the best thing to do. I know you might want a child, but that is for selfish reasons, and you would not be thinking about your child's future.
And I hope you dont try and go down the route of IVF or anything like that, those are resources best spent on other couples who are young but infertile. In your case you have just left it too late, you should not waste valuable resources like IVF trying to get pregnant when you have had over 20 years to get pregnant naturally. IVF should only be for those who have no other choice, who desperately want a baby but have been robbed of this chance for medical reasons.
I hope this doesnt sound nasty, I am not trying to be mean here I just want you to think carefully about this and realise that sometimes you just have to accept that nature has run its course here and it was not meant to be. Think about whether you could give the child the best possible life in your late 40's, 50's and 60's. Would you be around for their wedding? To see grand children? All those things a child wants their parents to be around for, there is a good chance you will not. It is not something to take lightly, it is not just as simple as "I want a child".
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
female
reader, Myrrh +, writes (30 June 2010):
 Hello. You can definately still get pregnant even if you are only having one period a year. As for your partner. Some of the "older style" vasectomies have been known to produce an offspring after many years....i have that on very good medical advice. But your partner can be tested to make sure he isnt fertile at all. Id ask him to get that checked if you really dont want any little surprises.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (30 June 2010):
 If he's had a vasectomy then of course you can't get pregnant, I means that's the whole point who get it done for kicks?
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