A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I broke up with my ex a year and half ago. He didnt take it well and so I gave him another chance and we end up seeing each other again for a short whileafter eight months into being apart. We were just hanging out, not official though. Totally ended it with him when I found out he had sex with one of my so called friends. Now we don't speak at all, but recently I found out some info about him that really hurt me. When we started dating, he had been broken up from a long term girlfriend for about five months. When we talked about our pasts, he led me to believe that he just had been with her and there were a couple random hookups before and after her. They had dated for about two years. When I started dating him, my brother's girlfriend made comments like "ew he's so gross" but I thought it was just cuz she didn't like him. Now, I suddenly find out that before me he hooked up with like twenty other girls. He never cheated on me supposedly, but I'm kind of grossed out by this knowledge. I know past is past, but it kind of hurts to know he was so dirty and not only that putting me at risk for disease. Our breakup literally killed him so I know he truly loved me, but from what I can see, he is back to being the same way, sleeping with pretty much anything. I don't know why this is even making me feel so bad because I have someone else now, I guess its just a betrayed feeling or something. Can anyone make sense of it? I mean I sort of feel glad secretly that he pretty much had a breakdown when I left him and he still hasnt found a girlfriend, but on the other hand it totally angers me that he was so gross before me and I had no clue. Help me sort my feelings out please?
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 August 2011): I think your feeling hurt and upset because he's not the person you thought he was so it's probably shocked you a little bit and anyone would feel the same way to though to be honest.
Men like that are just slags though and will always be into shagging multiple women. They just like lot's of women and that's all their is to it. Each to their own though.
I think theirs no shortage of men out their like that. Basicly men are wired to spread their seed and that's why some men are like your ex.
I some times wonder if i will ever be able to trust another man fully because i see what a'lot of men are like so it's hard for me to berlive that someone will stay faithful. hope that helped
A
female
reader, sammy1986  +, writes (12 August 2011):
he has probably known that if you found out what he was like before you to got together he would of had no chance with you thats probably why he didnt tell you it sounds like you have had a lucky escape i would forget all about your ex and the past and move on and look forward to the future with your new boyfriend
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums +, writes (12 August 2011):
 If you have a sense of betrayal because he was a man whore before you got together and he never told you how much of a whore he was, because he knew that "little fact" might influence you to drop him. It's not exactly a lie, but it's still a sin of omission and so it might as well be might as well be a lie. So, he plays women and lies to them.
Including you. That hurts.
The fact is that by concealing this, he might have put your health at risk; so please get a total check up at the doctors to be safe. Having to visit a doctor because a guy has lied to me about his past would be more than enough to piss me off and make me very angry. Sure.
Your feelings are quite legit under those circumstances. It might make you feel better to call him up or bump into him and tell him off, that might give you a 'feeling of closure' about this, but it's not going to change anything about your circumstances because, after all, he's your ex. It's hardly worth the effort and he might get a kick out of the fact that you are still thinking about him!
I would try to move on. Most girls have a bad boy or player in their past. They are in their 'past' for a good reason - the same as your ex.
You have dodged a bullet here.
And if you DO happen to bump into him in the future with a new girl - there's no law against cluing her in! =;^}
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