A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: So, there is this girl. Intelligent, charming, good looking and so on. We get along really well, our conversations are great and I just think our personalities are compatible. But...she is very VERY hard to read; I don't think she's easily impressed and she simply doesn't date. Can anyone help me figure out how to get such a hard-to-impress girl to like me back? Thank you Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2012): No offence to the previous posters but unless you want to be just another sorry sap who pisses and moans about being stuck in the friendzone then you really shouldn't listen to TasteofIndia's advice. Friendship with a girl you really like is idiotic and painful, and you still won't get her.
How do you know she doesn't date? Because OP if she told you she doesn't date that means she doesn't date you specifically. You've really never been rejected like that before?
OP when a woman says she's not interested in a relationship right now, or that she doesn't date or that she's not ready, that always means she's not interested in you.
Trust me, I've been dating, shagging and in relationships for almost 20 years.
The amount of women I've heard say they don't date etc. to me or my guy friends only to be seen in the arms of another man that night or the next week etc. is huge.
I'd say 9 out of 10 times.
I actually find it quite hilarious how many people actually do it and how many people don't get that it's a downright rejection. I will say though that a girl who is that afraid of hurting a persons feelings to the point where they won't directly reject them are still obtainable for a one night stand if you know how to play to their submissive, sensitive nature but that's obviously not your intention here.
As far as how can you make her like you, you can't. She's either interested or she's not and 100 years of friendship is not going to change that.
Also stop trying to read girls, it doesn't do anything, it serves no purpose but to make you over think things and even worse just actually put too much fear and doubt in your mind. You're a guy, you're best served through action and not thinking. I have friends like you, long term single friends that whenever they meet a girl they try and figure out every situation, they stress every single word, they look for signs and they won't do anything until they're fully sure she's interested and safe to say that's why they're still single with a dating history based solely on failed dating and regretting not just going for it.
What I would do is simple, I'd just start asking her to go places with me and just not label them dates. I'd start flirting with her, getting physically affectionate with her and after a few of these "not called" dates I'd steal a kiss and take it from there.
OP you don't get a girl romantically if you pursue her platonically. You have to romance a girl to create romance.
Friednzone or girlfriend, the choice is yours.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2012): I agree with TasteofIndia - don't chase her. Be friends with her, let her know you would like to date her romantically, but play it cool like you don't NEED her just to get a GF or get laid. Make her think if she doesn't wanna get to know you there are plenty of other girls who will.
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A
female
reader, Aemita +, writes (2 August 2012):
If she said out loud that she 'doesn't date' then please, take her word for it! She means it!
If you only think, she doesn't date.. then why not take the lead and drop hints around her. Maybe she's not only hard to read, but maybe she has a hard time herself reading the signals that others give away (in this case, you).
What do you have to lose? Nothing! Try your luck and if it goes uphill, great for you! If it doesn't go (other than downhill).. at least you know where exactly the both of you stay.
Take care dear! ^_~
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (2 August 2012):
She doesn't date. Well, okay. It seems to me she's really not going to like guys trying to impress her. If you like her, I would do something counter-intuitive - stop chasing her. Assume you'll never date and just get to know each other as friends. Maybe she really needs to feel comfortable and secure with somebody before considering getting interested.
But, if the glaring sentence here is true - if she "simply doesn't date", then I'd say that's probably clear enough. And friendship is all you'd get anyway!
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (2 August 2012):
Why doesn't she date?
I mean if she doesn't date, why keep trying?
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