A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: i feel like i have/going to miss out on so much in life because of my shyness.i find it hard to bring up conversations, and most of the time in social situations i just stand there, not talking.however, when im with my frends, i can be so talkative and silly.its like im 2 different people.any tips on how i can be the more outgoing me in front of new people and other friends.:)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2008): i am the exacccct same way.
and then one day, i accidently got drunk and went to best buy and i made like 1903223912 friends in the store.
then i realized, when i was sober, that i dont need to be shy. at all. its stupid, im charming ad witty and i can be that way all the time.
stop caring what people think. just dont go tooo crazy now
btw. that whole best buy thing? that was just yesterday.
A
male
reader, live it up! +, writes (28 January 2008):
I have some great advice for you. When you are around other people especially those that you do not know start asking questions about them. The key to doing this the right way is turn it into a game for yourself. The game is to get them talking about themselves. the way to win the game is to have them talk more about themselves then you talking about yourself. Remember! one thing though, listen to the people you are talking to and be interested in them. One more bit of advice be yourself as your inerchld (who you would have been when you were 5 or 6 years old. Have fun with life and goodluck.
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A
female
reader, violentviolet +, writes (27 January 2008):
If you fake confidence enough then eventually it will become real. Just think of someone who you know and admire and see how they act in the social situations that you are afraid of. If you don't know what to say then just think what they would say.
That having been said, you are probably just better suited to one on one conversations, and there's nothing wrong with that.
Confidence will come later on in your teens, trust me it did for me :)
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (27 January 2008):
I grew us with the same isssues you have. Its OK. For some it's part of growing up. Now everyone is outgoing and talkative to everyone, or the social butterfly a the party. I'll tell you what hels me. Small talk.
I'm still like that, I was in an elevator last week after going to a court hearing I was watching. A lady was in there with one of the "I gan go anywhere" idendtifications around her neck. I asked her if she was a lawyer. She said no, introduced herself, I returned the introduction and we had a good conversation for a few minutes.
There are classes offered that help with this. You can also look on the internet for things you can do. look under "treating social anxiety", or "social fobia", not saying that is what you have. You may be introverted as I am, but those sites still have good information on little steps you can take to let yourself come out of the shell.
I hope this helps you.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (27 January 2008):
You need to let yourself be free. Think of them as close friends even when you just met them. When I meet someone new, I think of them like my close friends. It is just a natural feeling. Be friendly and interested in them.
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