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Break up money trouble?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Breaking up, Three is a crowd, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 November 2008) 4 Answers - (Newest, 25 November 2008)
A female United Kingdom age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Hiya,

I've recently had a relationship break up which has been very difficult. It was me that did the breaking up and obviously the feeling wasn't mutual so my ex seems to have been rather bitter about it, this of course I understand.

However we own a house together. When we finished, I moved out and agreed to pay my share of the mortgage and a few other bits that came with it. As you can imagine this became difficult as I was also renting elsewhere. However I've always tried my best to pay in what I can and have always covered my half of the mortgage. Now, thank god, the house has been sold and the year of struggling to make ends meet is due to come to an end very soon.

The problem I've got is that my ex wants me to pay half of the credit card debt, which isn't in my name, and I'm confused as to where I stand legally?

I'm happy to make a contribution as would hate to be left with lots of debt. But the truth is, despite knowing there was a credit card, I wasn't aware of how much the debt was, and was shocked to discover the total and the suggestion that half of it was my debt due to being off work 3 months. I have never used the credit card so can only assume this was on bills etc. However I'm sure this wouldn't reach the total it has done just by having three months off. I'm also convinced it has been used for other things that have nothing to do with me.

Bascially I need help??? I want to be fair but due to a hard year I now have my own debts to pay and don't think it's fair that my ex's gets paid and I'm left with nothing.

please help???? thanksx

View related questions: debt, money, moved out, my ex

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (25 November 2008):

Tisha-1 agony auntI'd say that you do need some legal advice, it sounds like you're not liable for any debts he incurred. The only way I could see you being responsible for the credit card debt is if it was used on the house. But in that case, he should be able to present the credit card bill with the pertinent charges obviously there.

So he was out of work for 3 months, how is it that you need to pay support to him for that in the form of paying off half his debt? Makes no sense to me.

Perhaps an accountant might be of help here as well?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2008):

Dear Poster

Legally he is responsible for his Credit Card debt to the bank if it is in his name only and you did not sign as go debtor or surety or anything, you are not reliable. However, I can hear that you feel morally obliged to contribute towards this debt, but I would advise you not to make any such offers or suggestions at this stage as he might use that against you. You do not have to pay anything, do your own budget planning and then see and decide if you still want to be so generous to make an contribution to his debt. You don't have to legally.

Do not make any offers or suggest any to him or to the lawyers attending to the sale of your property.

Contact the website as suggested by "ask eve" and get legal advise if you get threatened by him. But I am very sure of my fact unless the law is totally different in your country.

Best wishes and lots of smiles

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A female reader, Honeygirl South Africa +, writes (25 November 2008):

Honeygirl agony auntSweetie, first of all the credit card is in his name so he is responsible for it... unless when he applied for it you signed surety??? I would suggest that since he is being rather nasty about the whole break-up that you consult a lawyer so that your ex knows that you are not going to be bullied into paying off his debts.

Honeygirl

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A female reader, AskEve United Kingdom +, writes (25 November 2008):

AskEve agony auntAs I see it, if the credit card is in HIS name then HE is liable for the debt... end of! Have a look at this site entitled "Answer Bank". In this link you can ask for legal advice free of charge and they answer within 10 minutes or so. This will hopefully confirm what I already said.

http://www.theanswerbank.co.uk/Law/

~Eve~

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