A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My fella of 6 months is struggling with bills even though he works. He has a mortgage to meet and has been worrying about winter fuel bills taking more. He cannot afford to go out except once a month, without me, so we stop in and one of us cooks, buys wine. He decided to rent out his spare room so we put an Ad together. My problem is a woman has decided she wants it and will be moving in soon.I have my own place so if we want alone time it will be at mine. I trust him but feel uncomfortable with a strange woman sharing his home. He says it does not seem quite right but he needs the rent which I agree he needs. He has not given much away about her even when I have askedHow do I get past this uncomfortable feeling? Thanks in advance. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, 2LovelyKids  +, writes (10 October 2012):
 I agree with the previous posts, you know your boyfriends situation, and right now there is no need to feel uncomfy until he gives legit reasons to be. He needs $$, so you just keep being supportive as you are and if he loves you and respects what the two of you have, you have absolutely nothing to worry about. Remember, regardless of how she is, it takes 2 to tango so if anything was to ever happen (which it shouldn't) it is because it was going to happen anyway.. not just because he has a female roomate.
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (10 October 2012):
 My boyfriend lived with two attractive women his own age with similar interests this year, while we were long distance. One of them even had a crush on him. As a group the three of them also hung out and went places together. Nothing happened the entire time.
It's a little uncomfortable to think about at first, but you just have to trust your boyfriend. If he was going to cheat, just having a female roommate wouldn't be why. Make a mental image of you closing the book or door or something on those thoughts. It does help. It might be tricky at first but after a few weeks you'll stop worrying about it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2012): Darling you need to trust your bf. What are you afraid of? Is she that drop dead gorgeous that you think she can steal your man?Do you really think that the woman renting the space likes your bf? Or maybe just your imagination?Does your bf has some cheating history during your relationship with him in the past?Don't allow yourself getting paranoid, over something your not yet sure..If your bf loves you, he will put your mind at ease.No one can help you get rid of your uncomfortable feelings but you..You know that he needs the money immediately, that's why he wants someone to rent the space as soon as possible. If his for you, no matter who try to separate you from him he will still choose to be with you at the end of the journey.Just have a little trust in him..good luck..
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A
female
reader, fishdish +, writes (10 October 2012):
 You know it's for financial reasons, because you helped him with it, he didn't just underhandedly decide he needs to live with a female. So you shouldn't be threatened by her. Most roommates keep to themselves and aren't looking to be friends, let alone anything more serious. It's just a financial arrangement. Did you just assume a guy would be interested, or you didn't realize that you'd feel uncomfortable about it being a female til it was actually happening?
Also, just because she's moved in does not mean that you two cannot see each other at his house anymore. Yes, you shouldn't be having screaming matches in the bedroom or leave the door open while intimate, but as long as you're civil and respectful of the roommate, it should not change your routines drastically. Hope that helps.
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