A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ive been with my boyfriend for over 3 years. i have never worried about him cheating on me i have never really worried about much when he's out. Now he has started to hang out with an old friend of mine(and i know his dirty habits) and don't trust the people he's with at all. Now all i keep thinking about when he's gone is "is he with him", "is he cheating on me". He also doesn't like to tell me when he is with him. And he seems to be going out with them more often then i thought. Other friends as well say its bad news. What do i do?? do i trust him with them??? could he possibly be cheating on me??? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Oregongrl1  +, writes (2 August 2010):
You know once you been together awhile you start finding out alot about the one you thought you knew? i met someone he was a gentlemen sweet gentle thoughtful and a real ladies man. when we first met after about 6 months things started happening that i was like confused it started messing w/ my head because of what once was, wasn't anymore. and i didn't know what to do or how to react without him thinking i was crazy! or that i was insecure of jealous. so i went w/ the flow you know. and as time had passed things got worse and by then i didn't know how to get out of it because i was hooked by then. so you see i was never crazy and that was good to know, but now i didn't know how to leave or get out of it well 13 yrs later! i finally grew the balls LoL and never looked back. now i can see everything w/ open eyes now that im not in it anymore. he was not a good man, if i can even call him that. well he passed here last yr! but what iam trying to tell you is what you are feeling you are not wrong play it smart and use your head catch him at his game and find out what he's all about if it will make it easier for you to walk and give you closure. if you see him on line why don't you im him and be honest! who cares if he thinks your jealous, he's a lier whats worse. and you are not jealous he just makes you feel like that because they are covering something up? so they get very defensive and start having an unnormal conversation so you will back off and you do don't you? rejection is the hardest thing to deal with besides the loss of a loved one! don't let him make you weak i would show him your not you are a strong woman who has total respect for yourself and that you are not going to take his *hit hell what do you got to loose really he will either wake up and if he doesn't is he really worth it then? good luck i do hope you wake up for you because right around the bend is a wondeful person waiting for you.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell i talked to him..I told him id rather know hes with people i don't like then have him lieing to me. So he is more open and talks to me about things they do. But he is still lieing about how much time he spends with him. He says he's goin to bed but i see him online 2 hours after he said gudnite. I feel like i am losing him but i don't know why?? i want to spend more time with him but i don't want to seem to paranoid or obsessive.I just wish it could just go back to the way things were a month ago.
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A
female
reader, xtruestory3 +, writes (8 July 2010):
 I am in the same situation. I cant understand why he doesn't want to tell me when he's with these people. I hate the people he knows. And I get pretty paranoid as well. I decided the best thing to do was to sit down with him and deeply tell him that I am there for him and am not going anywhere and that he can be 1000% honest with me and that he doesnt have to treat me like a stranger just cuz he wants to hang out with his friends even though i dont like him. once i did this he seemed to be a lot more open about it and actually hasnt hung out with them since. He has actually seemed to want to spend more time with me since i told him i would be glad to do the things his buddies do with him. it has made us a lot closr. i suggest you try it though. goodluck:)
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A
male
reader, lsickle +, writes (8 July 2010):
hey how u doin...whenever a partner lies to u about where they have been or who there with its natural to get suspicious. But on the bright side it could be he is devoloping a drug problem or worse losing his feelings for u either u are goin to have to act. Go thru his stuff his phone everything. Get evidence of what he is doin before u confront him or u may never know the truth.
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A
female
reader, Oregongrl1 +, writes (8 July 2010):
It's not them who you need to trust! your boyfriend is the one you should trust! and i would talk to him and tell him how you feel you say you have been together for 3 yrs! why can't you talk to him. at least then you will know where you stand w/ each other.Good Luck!
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