A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my boyfriend for 5 months now. He's really amazing, he always puts me first and acts like a perfect gentleman and he's very sweet and forgiving. But he can't stop flirting behind my back. He doesn't do it in person, only on texts and on facebook. But the things he tells them are crossing the line, telling them that he wants to marry them or that he still loves them etc. He always insists he's stopped but then i catch him. And the worst part is he'll never admit to anything until i catch him, he'll call me paranoid, even though he knows how much it hurts me.So should I just accept that's the way he is or is there a real problem?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2011): Speaking from personal experience:
It does not matter whether he flirts with these other girls in person or not. He is obviously making false promises to you which he has no intention of keeping, which is the same as lying to you. The more you forgive him or give him "another chance", he's going to take advantage of it even more.
The fact that you can say that he never admits it's his fault proves even more so thy he does not see anything wrong with his behavior. Hence he is unlikely to change anytime soon.
Sorry...
A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (31 May 2011):
 This is a real problem and I don't think that he is ready for a relationship. I am one to say that flirting is generally harmless and I am comfortable with it in my relationship but what he is saying is too far. Also he is continuing to do it while trying to hide it.
You deserve a better guy then this.
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