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male
age
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*erti1151
writes:I have feelings for a female at work,but I am 52 and she is 29.Is this too much of an age difference?How would I tell if there is any interest on her part?
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male
reader, rhapsody888  +, writes (9 May 2009):
This is the latest.She has received a text message from someone anonymous, basically telling her that they are sorry to hear that she has split with me, because I am such a great guy and a good catch. I have no idea who has sent it, but obviously she thinks it is me.I have obviously told her that it is nothing to do with me, but she does not believe me.I said, it is best that we now have no contact.What is going through this woman's mind?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2007): age does not matter.
im 13 and i fancy a 50 year old
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2007): I don't think this age gap has anything with true love. Age just a number. You may view a age gap site, agematch.com, where you can see many big agegap story, they are very beautiful..
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2007): When it comes to love, age is nothing. So no matter how big the age difference. If you really love her, and also she has the same the feeling, everything goes easy. I met my older guy who is 25 years older than me at Agematch.com, and we enjoy this big age gap relationship. The big age gap love is really an extremely wonderful different romance.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2007): it's not a big age gap...who cares....if you like her and get the feeling she likes you...go for it man...life is too short...ask her out...if you don't you'll always regret it.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2007): My bf is 63, I am 33 and we are very happy and have been for 4 yrs! I have a kid and so does he so we didn't have those difficult issues where one may want to start a family and the other doesn't as we both didn't want more kids. In saying that though I know of v successful age gaps where they have had kids. Get to know your lady better and find out if her dreams, eg kids,marriage are compatible with yours. These issues are not just for age gaps but all relationships! Good luck x
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2007): forget about it man ... even if you get her once or twice ... she ll drop you as soon as something better comes along ... keep up the dreams but keep your feet on the ground ... unless you re loaded .. some woman like that
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male
reader, berti1151 +, writes (29 September 2007):
berti1151 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for your replies!
I did chat casually about what she ie looking for-a hard working single guy.I asked what age range and she said age didnt matter.She is out of a divorce and has a 5 yr old girl.This is fine with me.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2007): Well it might fly. I would think if you were the 29 year old and she was 52 it would be tougher. People are still judgemental of an older woman and younger man but more accepting of this situation. Some of the other readers bring up some practical points. Assuming that you are interested in this lady in a serious sense...have you been married...were there children from that union. It there were you might not be enamoured with 'starting over'. However I have seen this situation work but often the older partner has to work a few more years into possible retirement years to support the new family. I am skipping ahead here. I would say..flirt a bit and see what she does. Good luck...what meant to be will be.
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female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (29 September 2007):
I would say the age gap is too big to have a relationship. Sure you both may get along really well and you may both have feelings for each other, but whether or not a relationship would work is a different question. What you both want/need from the realtionship and your life is so different. She is at one part of her life which you have moved on from....
I mean think about issues such as children and marriage if you two were to try and have a relationship?
However, you dont know what she wants yet so perhaps you could give it a try.
If I was you, I would do what someone else suggested, have a general convo about age gaps and see what she says. That way you know your chances.
Hope it works out for the best :)
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female
reader, Lilli b +, writes (29 September 2007):
 For me personally, I would find this slightly too much of an age gap as I would prefer to build a relationship with someone who will 'get it' when I refer to old tv programmes, music, political events etc that I have lived through but that is my personal thing - for you and the woman who you have feelings for perhaps not. It is, as Melanne suggests, purely personal and down to the two people involved.
In general, I think it is worth considering certain lifestyle choices that relationships involve. For instance, a couple may choose to get together who are the same or similar ages but a conflict of lifestyle choices, such as do we want to live together, do we want children etc make a relationship impossible.
I imagine that you haven't yet spoken to the woman in question about either your feelings or what is important to you and her in a relationship.
I don't know how much contact you have had so far and how your feelings for her have grown. Is it just attraction to how she looks or have you already built a friendship from which your feelings have developed?
If the former, then I would suggest getting to know her and trying to find out whether you are looking for similar things (for instance, at 52 are you interested in becoming a father because chances are, at 29 this woman is likely to want children although not necessarily but it is the kind of thing you might need to think about). If you are already friends then finding out this information will not be so difficult.
Often, it is easy to read whether someone is interested in us because the signals are there but not always. If you are picking up no signals it is possible that she is not interested but it is also possible that she is afraid to expose her interest.
So if no signals the only thing you can do is talk to her and ask her. You have to take the risk if you think she is worth it. If you are really nervous about this then make more general enquiries - generate conversations about age gaps in relationships and see how she reacts.
Good luck
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A
male
reader, Tommy7 +, writes (29 September 2007):
You need to make her a friend first. You do that by talking and doing things for her. After that you'll sense whether or not she could like you as a bf.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2007): Age is just a number, my friend. I am in the same situation except our ages are 30 and 51. If you like her, go for it! What do you have to lose? Also, check out a great relationship support site, MIND THE age GAP, at www(dot)mindtheagegap(dot)com.
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female
reader, Melanne +, writes (29 September 2007):
 I think it's up to you two at the end of the day not up to anyone else. Yeah sure there will be people who try to interfere but, if you two like each other then there is nothing wrong with that.
In answer to your next question I think you should ask her how will you know if you never ask her the worse she can say is no but, at least then you will know if there was ever a chance.
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