A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Im dating someone whos 19 years older then me...and i dont know if i should finish it because of the age gap. Help? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2008): No! If you love him, it should not matter how old he may be. Love conquers all things! if it's just a fling however, it may not be all that worth it. Life's too short to shy away those you love and want.
A
female
reader, Blue_Angel0316  +, writes (27 December 2008):
 At your age hon you definately should. This person could be using you. Since you didn't give much information I can't elaborate but since you are so young the habits and needs of someone that much older is most likely very different. He is most likely a Father figure to you, however if not the maturity level is bound to be significantly different. It can cause all sorts of problems.
I would say that age is just a number, but with exception to the idea, when someone is your age and involved with a man or woman who is 19 years older, it makes one wonder just what the older person is looking to gain from this relationship. Be cautious that you aren't being lead on or getting involved in an extra marital relationship. You can become too involved and cause yourself alot of hurt. Let him go and find someone who is closer to your age.
I think you posted here out of concern that things with your present relationship isn't all that it should be. I DON'T think you would be asking if you WERE certain that it was a GOOD one. You ARE showing maturity and good common sense in your thought. GOOD FOR YOU!
Now turn around and face your yourself, be good to yourself and find someone who connects with you on your level. Leaving less worry for you so you can have all the fun and joy that a good, healthy relationship should bring. Keep your YOUTH and save your years for someone who can share it all with you!
God bless,
Blue_Angel
^(**)^
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A
female
reader, Ck1 +, writes (27 December 2008):
first of all you need to work out how good a guy he is, and find out why he is with you before you do anything sudden, if he treats you well and you love him, dont worry about the age, although find out alot about the man first of all hun,
goodluck x
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A
male
reader, Phsyciatrist-to-be +, writes (27 December 2008):
 I wouldnt end it simply because of the age gap if you both love each other. But the difference may throw up difficulties in the future, such as him wanting more out of the relationship than you're ready for (such as sex). Just be very careful in how you go about things, and dont let him try and force you into anything you dot want to do.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2008): hey hun,seeing your age first i would think this guy is a pedofile.. but i think back to when i first met my husband (hes 15 years older than me) and what everyone was saying about him.. with most guys there would have to be something wrong with thier head to even consider dating someone your age if they were the age of your man... but there are some decent guys out there, like my husband, who is amazing... anyways. the one thing i can tell you is do what your heart tells you. dont worry about society or what your family thinks because in the end ur family will still love you no matter what and society will get over it. having said that i must tell you that i honestly dont think its a good idea you stay with this guy.. i mean hes 19 years older than you. holy crap, you two are in different worlds age and maturity wise. you may not think so, but you grow and mature, and even change so much from the age of about 16 to 26.... and hes like 37, can you imagine how different your minds must be? i know its hard to understand or believe what im saying, but seriously. take my advise and get out while you still can meaning like before you get married and stuff. a lil bout me and my husband: i began dating him when i was 16 while i was still seeing another guy who i loved very much. this other guy (who was only 21) was my best friend and my lover. well anyways.. for some reason i started to date my now husband, we will call him P.. so i left my ex boyfriend for P. i began to like P a lot, and knowing that my parents wouldnt be okay with me seeing P because of his age, i ran away to be with him and then ended up coming home.. some other things happened and then finally i got my mom to meet P and she did, and realized he wasnt a creap and he was a really great guy, so she let me move out with him.. then.. when i was 17 we got married. i am now 18 and married to an almost 34 year old man, a father of two, and i cant shake the feeling that it was a very bad idea to marry him. the thing is when i met him i convinced myself that i could handle being with an older man and that i could handle being a mommy to two lil girls (who are 8 and 13), but just recently i have realized i really cant. its too much for any 16, 17, or 18 year old to deal with.you need to live your life, do things you have always wanted to do, and just be YOU for a while longer before you commit to a man who is 37, someone who has probably already lived there life, someone who is already ready to settle down and have children if he hasnt already. just to let you know its not the age difference that matters, cuz in my opinion it doesnt matter the age gap, what matters is both of your intentions, and the fact that you are only 16 or 17... really hunny, please just live ur life for a while before you date someone that old.. hope that helps at least a lil.
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A
male
reader, Chippymunk  +, writes (27 December 2008):
 Disregard the age difference and answer this question - Do you love him?
Age is just a number. Being with the one you love is much more important than worrying about what people might think.
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