A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Dear all,I have been with my girlfriend for over a year, and we have a strong relationship. Last night, however, she revealed to me that one of my supposed closest friends told her that he was in love with her, and that I was a bastard who wasn't good enough for her. This happened over Christmas, but it came out last night in a drunken purging of secrets. The news that someone I thought was a friend has been slagging me off behind my back to the person that matters most in my life has really got to me, and I do not know how to deal with it. He and my girlfriend have become close friends as I have, admittedly, drifted away from him, but I feel betrayed. The worst - and most surprising - bit is that he has been in a relationship with a girl who he, as I understand it, is completely in love with for five years.I live in the same building as this guy, and he knows that she has told me, so now the next time I see him I am going to have to pick him up on it. I am not going to threaten him, just let him know that I know exactly what he has been saying, and tell him that I want nothing to do with him anymore. I am not going to tell my gf to stop seeing him - it is up to her to judge the situation.I would really appreciate some friendly advice.Thanks xx
View related questions:
christmas, drunk Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Chippymunk  +, writes (30 January 2011):
 You must be mature in this situation. How you are approaching this is correct. Do not threaten him, but just let him know that you know. He was drunk at the time so it may have been an accident or he didn't fully mean all the things he said. Tell him it is best if you guys didn't converse anymore but also tell him you're not full of murderous hatred for him. You don't want to make an enemy here, just for him to leave you and hopefully your gf alone. Tell him that you love your gf very much and it would be noble of him if he did not act on his love impulse. It is very mature of you to not directly prevent your gf from talking to him, but also let her know that it makes you uncomfortable if she talks to him. If she respects your feelings, then she will drift away from him too.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (29 January 2011):
Your friend just became expendable, is my advice. I would say calmly (and in a public place) that you know what he said and don't want to hear from him again.
Also, if he and your girlfriend have become close, keep an eye on that.
...............................
|
