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female
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anonymous
writes: Should I leave my husband?I have been married for a year. I have started to lose interest in this marriage and I don't know what to do.We hardly make love. He has a low sex-drive and we hardly make out once a week. That's not healthy for a newly-wed isn't it? When we do, he makes it an event that he enjoys, not considering what I want and things ended in "less than a minute". I feels quite frustrated and there's no one that I can talk to. I didn't want to hurt his pride, but I am really thinking of leaving him.He is also very possessive, trying to keep track of my whereabouts all the time. He earns little and barely coping with his own expenses, I pay the rest.Other than this, we are generally getting along well. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, bumble bee +, writes (11 July 2006):
the only way this will be resolved is if you talk to him, tell him your not happy and that things have gota change and if you can see after a while he hasnt made an effort then if you feel it is the rite thing to do leave him, but remember forcing someone to have sex when they dont want to is rape, just ask him to be a bit more considerate.
hope i help xXx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2006): Lots of people's sex lifes dwindle a bit after the first few months of marriage are over. Also, you mention that you only make out once a week...you're actually quite lucky, most married couples don't make out anymore..Try to instigate things with him, though, when you are feeling in the mood. Also, with regards to your finances - "his" expenses and you pay the rest? You are married, there should be no separate expenses. That can be a difficult thing to get used to but after year you should certainly be on your way to having joint finances. See if you can help him look for a full-time job, though- if he were earning more money and spent his time doing something constructive, maybe there would be less time for feeling jealous and possessive.
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A
female
reader, hannieseds  +, writes (23 June 2006):
 Hi there,
How long were you with this man before you were married?
You have only been married a year - early early early days yet! You took vows just a year ago for better or worse so you owe it to yourself AND to your marriage to make a real go of this. Marriage councelling would probably be the best option so you can talk on an even-keal and say what is on your mind about his possessiveness & the other problems with a qualified expert.
I don't really understand - has he always been this way? - low sex drive, possessive etc? If he has, then why did you marry him in the first place if you weren't 100% happy? Did you think marriage was going to make everything better? Maybe some more info might help us help you a bit better. xxx
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