A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My bf and i have been going out for almost two years. For 5 1/2 months he was in Austria and we stayed together. He was back for a week before he had to leave for uni. Everything was fine for that week. Two days after going to uni we get into a little argument because i said we would both need to make time for each other and he tells me that he thinks i need someone who can give me a lot of attention and wants a break. I told him that i didnt and once we were in a patteren of talking and visitng each other things would be fine. I am doing a course in a different town that will take 3 years but after the 1st one i can move to where he is and im happy to do this. He thinks we should break up until i have finsihed my course.I dont know what to do or think i really think that we could still be happy together even if i dont move to where he is.I dont want to loose him.Please help me what do i do
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female
reader, GeeGee255  +, writes (26 February 2011):
 I don't think he is trying to hurt you, I think he just doesn't feel like he will be able (or willing) to keep up with his studies and make sure you don't feel neglected at the same time. Cindycares is right it could work if he were willing to set a side a large chunck of time just for you. For visits and phone calls. But apparently he isn't.
So your only choice now is how well are you going to take the break up? With your dignity intact, I hope.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (26 February 2011):
 I think he wants to break up in a diplomatic way.
It's true that when there is a will there is a way in the most complicate situations, and you could get into a pattern of seeing and visiting each other... but that would require time, committment , effort from both sides and it does not seem that he is prepared to make sacrifices or budget his time to keep this relationship going. And a 3 years break ?? This is just absurd ! considering also that you have the possibility to reach him after one year, - which would be a good plan but that he does not want you to do. Therefore it sounds ,unluckily, that he is looking for an easy , non confrontational way out.
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