A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes: I have been divorced for many years. Now that the kids are grown up and have left the house, I feel like I need to have a partner and get married. I am almost a 60 year old man. I would presumably be looking for a woman close to my age. Sex is not the only important thing in a relationship but it is one of the important part of a healthy relationship for me. I have never dated anyone above 50 and I hear that many women lose interest in sex past their menopause. As far as sex drive is considered, I feel no different that when I was in my 30s. My question is if women indeed are no longer interested in sex in their 50s and over and if I am better off not going through the hassle of getting married at this age. I appreciate your kind input.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2020): I can't speak for other women over 50, but I'm still very much interested in sex. In fact, my boyfriend and I have a very active sex life.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2020): In our 20's we all talked about our sex lives. But now the same friends, in our 60's, (i'm 70) never mention it. My wife thinks we're the only ones still doing it. But in our 50's she was still more game than me. But my old lady loves oral now more than ever, both ways. It much easier. My chick doc keeps writing me the Blue pill scrips. She says sleep, exercise and sex -- can't get enough -- can be done in the same 20 sq feet. And she uses the F word. Sort of like that.
Speaking from experience, women in their 50's still love it.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (30 June 2020):
I think for most women in their 50+ GOOD sex is a "normal part" of a relationship and marriage. Are there women who no longer want it? Sure. Are there women who become OK with not getting it due to illness in the partner? Sure. Replace women with me and you would get the same answer.
Take your time in finding the RIGHT partner before you marry. Make sure she is an overall good fit, not just as into sex as you. And when you go though the dating and get to the point of intimacy, verbalize your needs to a potential wife BEFORE the marriage.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2020): As a woman in that age group I can assure you that yes sex is hugely important . As someone mentioned it may not be something I need as frequently but certainly regular great sex is a massive part of a living relationship . The menopause can be a difficult time to get through and can mess temporarily with the sexual drive for some women but every woman I know who has a living partner is very interested
I think when we hear that women lose interest over 50 this is typically I. Relationships where the partners are perhaps suffering ex and pass the responsibility onto the women or the women end up feeling undesirable because their partners are too busy eyeing 30 yr olds .
You sound great and I’m sure you will have a wonderful relationship with a lady your age and a fantastic sex life
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2020): Do all men need Cialis or Viagra after they turn 50? Why do many stop working-out and let themselves go? Does dating younger-women guarantee you a great sex-life?
Your question can only be answered by the individual you've met; and you'll determine whether their libido is still intact when they get to know you well enough. Then the counter-question is, will women under 50 still find you attractive enough to want to take a chance on YOU?
You cannot make a blanket-assumption about people based on their age; and may I remind you that this is the most sexist and presumptuous assumption ever. Of course age will affect our (both genders) sex-drive; but not only that, it also depends on how you're treated and your emotional-state while you pursue romance. You might bring-out something in a woman no man before you ever has, or vice versa.
If you're a lousy-lover, sloppy in bed, or your technique sucks; you could have a 25 year-old lover, and she will roll her eyes in disappointment and disgust. Having a healthy sex-drive doesn't make you a good lover. If sex is a major and important prerequisite/requirement to a happy relationship; then it follows that there must be a fair exchange. If you get exactly what you want, can you always deliver? Everybody takes a chance and a risk, don't they? Sometimes it takes quite an adept lover with "staying power and stamina" to bring some women to orgasm. So who's to blame? Her, or her man?
By the time you're 50, most people have been married or are married. You have seen quite a bit of life, and have had more than a single sex-partner. Many women have been mistreated, or jilted, and become jaded. They may be emotionally-wounded to the degree that sex no longer matters. That happens at any age. Naturally the body starts to change when you've hit your 40's; and so it goes for either gender, that you may begin to have less of a drive than you had in your 20's. Sometimes your sex-drive is tremendous; but some men can't maintain a solid erection. Your testosterone level could suddenly drop, you could have prostate trouble, or you could develop diabetes; or be hit with a medical-issue that may cause erectile dysfunction. You are in the high-risk age-group! Nobody knows what age that could happen. Don't put all the pressure on women, my friend!
Women peak sexually between their late 30's to 50's, but everybody's different. So, unless you are going to require a medical-exam on every woman you meet over 50; I guess you will have to take as much of a chance on her, as she is on you. You might have a strong sex-drive, maybe stronger than even in your 20's; but every man knows that our penis sometimes has a mind of its own. It may wake-up when it should be asleep, or fall asleep when it should be awake! Your stamina may decline, even though your drive is at it's peak. Sometimes you can go for hours, and sometimes for only minutes.
Cross that bridge when you get to it. Seek a good-woman, be a good-man, and let nature take its course. It's always a gamble; and like a search for the holy grail to find "the one!" Someone who's that perfect-match in all areas, and the right fit. Then hope that your sex-dive doesn't take an unexpected dive, for whatever reason; and she doesn't end-up the one disappointed in your performance!
Take your time. Don't prejudge. Be understanding and kind. Providence will reward you.
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A
male
reader, BrownWolf +, writes (29 June 2020):
Although men and women lose their need for quantity in sex over the years, it never replaces quality in sex.
In your teens, twenties, and early thirties, the amount of sex you have seems to justify love. Meaning...the more your partner have sex with you, then they must love you a lot. But as you get older, how good the sex feels, becomes more important than the amount of sex you have.
However....Keep in mind...Men and women can become as exciting as cats and dogs, even in their teens. They can just be there, and end up feeling like your roommate.
Like cats and dogs that just lay around most of the time. They can become crazy animals if you know how to stimulate them properly. You see a lazy cat...But a laser pointer turns it into a kitten.
So no matter your age...If you bring the right stimulation, you may be the one begging the woman to slow down with how much sex you have.
I have never met a man who can out sex a woman...And if you think men have a higher sex drive then woman...WRONG!!! If you want more sex than her, then YOU have not turned on her sex engine yet. But when it starts...get your helmet on and hang on tight.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (29 June 2020):
Some women do have problems going through menopause when they are in their 40's and 50's but I can honestly say that yes there are most certainly women in their 50's and beyond that are definitely still interested in sex. I'm one of those women.
My mother in law bless her heart lost her husband at 72 and months later found a gentleman her age that she eventually married. It was crazy but the cutest thing she was suddenly buying Frederick's of Hollywood magazines and sex toys and from the little she disclosed they had a very good sex life! My own mother found her childhood sweetheart after my dad passed away and she went into waaay too much detail about their adventures in the bedroom. She is now 84 and still has sex.
Just make sure that if you get involved with a lady that before too much time goes by you find out if the lady is wanting to have sex and explain that its very important to you. Save yourself alot of heartache..have that talk before things get too far along or you can find yourself in a not great situation.
Good luck!!
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (29 June 2020):
Short answer: yes, women in their 50s are still interested in sex. I will never forget my FIL's second wife telling me, when she was close to 70 years of age, how much FIL liked seeing her in her black nighty. She then said that young people think they are the only ones having sex. I was in my 40s at the time.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2020): In my little expexience I think they become way more focused on sex as they are more experienced and know exactly what they want and how to get it. Pehaps our mature female readers can explain this better for you. Surely before talking marriage you will find out your partners feelings and thoughts about this subject.
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A
female
reader, singinbluebird +, writes (29 June 2020):
Plenty of women over 50 still want and crave sex but actually worry men 55yrs old+ are no longer interested because of ED, lack of care and arousal, and less interest in romance.
Online date and court and find out for yourself who you prefer but yes many women of all ages still want and crave sex, intimacy, courtship and romance.
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