A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I went to this party with my girlfriends. There were about 5 guys there that I used to be friends with and havent seen in a long time. I said hi and started drinking and dancing with them, while they were hugging me and flirting with me but I thought it was cool cuz they're my friends. My other girl friends we just dancing with themselves, not talking to anyone. When the party got broken up, one of the guy friends walked with me and I was really drunk at that point, so he started to press me up against him, hold my hands, hugging me etc. But when he started putting his hands on my boobs and butt, I took them off because I have a boyfriend and he has a girlfriend. After the party we went back to their house (with the girls) and talked for a while. Later everyone went to smoke outside except me and another guy (who I hooked up with last year). We talked for a while and he asked if I wanted to see his room and I said yes. He kissed me on the cheek and started to close the door. But I told him I had a bf and left. Later, I found out that the girls were calling me a slut! I just dont understand because even though the guys were all over me, all I did was put my arm around them when they did it to me and thats it! I didnt have sex with anyone and I didnt even kiss anyone!! Are they jealous that I was getting all the attention or was I really behaving like a slut?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, jaime90  +, writes (22 October 2008):
 Just think, what would have happened if you were single? If you were dismissing your girls to flirt (which you must have been doing or they would not have got the idea to take you to their room or feel you up) then it doesnt mean your a slut but maybe a little bit of an attention seeker. Do you think your bf would have been angry about your behaviour? actually, would you have been anrgy if you bf was acting the same way? obviously you knew that guy didnt want you to see his room noone is that dumb. are these guys really friends of yours? i dont think so! they just want to have sex with you! And after they were touching you all over YOU STILL WENT BACK WITH THEM?!?! what the hell. you knew what they wanted but you still went to their house. Flirting is not harmless. how long until you take it further? how would you feel if your bf was being groped by girls then went back to their house and went into their room? Not good im guessing... in my opinion you still want to be single. so leave your bf for his sake and then you can do what you want
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2008): you go girl, you deserve to have fun with friends you havent seen in a while, and getting drunk is a laugh lifes too short to be prim and proper. You are not a slut.If you had got with that guy then I would have said you were a bit too adventurous to not expect to be called a slut.so yeah your behavious was fine slut wise that night. but maybe the girls didnt know that and thought something had happened when u went to his room..?
However... you were flirting with the guys, maybe not intentionally, but admit it you wouldnt have acted that way had they been girls, or you a guy too like them. And also mayb e they are annoyed that you ignored them a bit.
i wouldnt put it past the girls to be jelous aswell
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A
male
reader, Crafter  +, writes (18 October 2008):
 Don't mean to sound harsh, but I think it was both. Admit it, you were kind of flirty.
To me it's personal, because I knew a girl which behaved just like you did (or at least I think so) without giving a damn how much damage she is causing.
I can understand that it's great being social and pretty. You can almost "control" boys around you, but with great power comes great responsibility. So... behave. Be outgoing, be nice, but don't over do it.
And don't play innocent. Why did you think those boys called you in their rooms? To show you their butterfly collections?
Exercise your power carefully, 'cause one day it might backfire.
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A
female
reader, babewithbrains  +, writes (18 October 2008):
 Well, getting yourself into this mess was a pretty dumb thing to do! Honestly, it is kinda silly going out with loads of boys, getting pissed then being suprised when two of them come on to you!
I think jealousy plays a major part in this, yeah, but maybe they have a point! Why weren't you out with your boyfriend.. wasn't he invited or is he ill or what?
It's VERY easy to get the wrong idea when you see twp people together, so maybe they saw him kiss you or something then shut the door to his bedroom - maybe it looked like you were all over him - I don't know!
Best of luck
Jelly
xxx
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A
female
reader, troubledinlove +, writes (18 October 2008):
u were not being a slut u were just enjoying youreself and when it came down to the sexual stuff u bailed so u were not nay kind of a slut
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2008): Were you ignoring the girls? I wouldn't call you a slut obviously! but if a girl was just flirting with the guys and ignoring everyone else, that annoy me. But I'm just trying to see it from their point of view
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