A
female
age
26-29,
*vni Hariharan
writes:i recently broke with my ex. he was having an affair with another girl and when i asked he denied it. we broke up and he said he is not a suitable guy for me and my family. but we still do video calls and talk for the whole night. actually we talk for few hours then i will sleep. i don't know why i always catch him looking at me when i am sleeping. when iasked he will denied it and pretended to be sleeping. My question is why he always look at me when I'm sleeping and is there any signs that he still loves me?
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affair, broke up, my ex Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (7 April 2017):
 If he has cheated on you then end the relationship and stop video calling him. If their is a girl saying she is his girlfriend then why not contact her and see what she has to say. Honestly it sounds like he is a bit off a player.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2017): If somebody cheats on you , they did not love you in the first place
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (5 April 2017):
 She says he is her boyfriend and he denies it ?...
Then, unless the girl is completely crazy and delusional, there must have been something going on between the two of them.
Otherwise ( unless she is mentally ill of course ) why would she be under the impression that she is the girlfriend.. of someone who always acted totally platonic and never showed her any romantic / sexual interest ?! Something more than just friendly must have happened between them; then maybe it's a question of labelling things differently.
I.e., maybe they have just been sexting, or hooking up occasionally, or even just flirting heavily... and she chose to see that as " relationship " while he chose to see it as " meaningless, casual fun ".
But, do you really think that she 'd call him her boyfriend if their exchanges had been limited to something like : " Hallo, John , beautiful day today , isn'it ? " " Yes, Sarah, but I have heard that tomorrow is going to rain "
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (4 April 2017):
 I agree if you are broken up CUT the contact and don't "let" him watch you sleep that is just ... creepy for an ex to do.
YOU need to accept he cheated on you and that CHEATING is not right for you. So wish him well and CUT him off.
That mean no more video call, no texting no calling or meeting up. NA DA! YOU move on and find someone WORTHY of your trust and love.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2017): People who love you don't cheat on you. And if they do, that love is meaningless.
Stop talking to him. Find someone better.
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A
female
reader, Avni Hariharan +, writes (4 April 2017):
Avni Hariharan is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSir I don't know whether it's true or what! Because she declares him as her boyfriend and he denies it. It's my first love and I have not experienced this kind of situation in my life. It's quite complicated.
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A
female
reader, Avni Hariharan +, writes (4 April 2017):
Avni Hariharan is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI don't know what to say. That girl calls him boyfriend and he calls her just a friend.
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A
male
reader, N91  +, writes (4 April 2017):
 Do you know for certain he was cheating or is it just a suspicion?
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A
female
reader, Avni Hariharan +, writes (4 April 2017):
Avni Hariharan is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI don't know whether we broke up or what! Because both of us didn't utter that word. Even he said "u came and fought. U itself broke everything." His friend said she is just his friend because his whole college knows that I'm his gf. I'm totally confused. I really appreciate ur advice and I think I need more advice to take a wise decision.
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (4 April 2017):
If he's cheating on you and you're still sleeping with him then you're enabling his cheating lifestyle.
Grow a backbone and block him from your life.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2017): If you broke-up with this guy; how and why is he able to watch you sleep?
You still do video calls and talk until you fall asleep. Then you have not broken-up, but he has. He still has bedroom privileges and you're trying to keep him occupied and away from the female he had an affair with.
When you breakup with someone; there is no contact between you, and he has no business in your bed. You're simply giving him permission to be a player. He can dip is wick in two places.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (4 April 2017):
Didn't you say that you broke up ?
Treat him like someone you have broken up with, then ! Treat him like the EX who he , supposedly, is.
No more video calls and no more whole night talk.
This will dispose of the need itself for asking these questions. By the way , what does it mean "... that he STILL loves me " ? Do you think that having an affair with another girl was evidence of his strong feelings for you and sincere love ??
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A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (4 April 2017):
 I thought you had broken up? How can you catch him looking at you when you are sleeping?
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