A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:For Guys and GalsMy boyfriend and I have sex daily. Dress up, role play,oral, sex in different locations, it goes on and on...The problem is he brings up anal sex a lot which we have done, but he says he loses patience with me because it takes me so long to warm up for it, but i'm willing to do it...he tells me it was so much easier with other women, they were built differently? it kinda makes me feel bad when he says this, he acts disappointed because he enjoys this type of sex so much....Any comments on this subject would be helpful??
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female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (23 April 2008):
 Your boyfriend is being a jerk if he's not being totally patient with you. Anal sex needs some easing into - and it only gets easier with lots and lots and lots of practice. For some women, it may always take awhile to get warmed up. Why don't you buy a strap-on and see if he can instantly adjust like he expects you to do?
The only thing you should feel bad about is letting this jerk bring you down. You need to stand up to him and tell him that he is DAMN LUCKY to have such a wonderful, open-minded lady to have fun with.
Good luck, sweetness!
xx India
A
female
reader, starfairy  +, writes (23 April 2008):
 That's awful for your boyfriend to say those things to you - not only is he making you feel inferior, inadequate and insecure about something you obviously find, in whatever ways, difficult, he's basically emotionally blackmailing you.
You should never be rushed or pushed into something before you feel ready.
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A
male
reader, Ares  +, writes (23 April 2008):
 Anon,
You need to relax about this issue. Anal sex is not something is wham bam thank-you ma-am. Your boyfriend should be grateful that you are willing to experiment and try things with him and be prepared to take the time to ensure that you hopefully enjoy the act. My partner and I talk about sexual issues all the time and I respect her limits and desires, as she does mine.
You are not built differently and should not worry about this, I would say that if this is painful and not enjoyable for you, don't do it! If he loves you he will understand. The comparing of you to other women only serves to humiliate you and act as a turn off. He should grow up.
If you are so inclined to continue to please your boyfriend in this way here are some links that may help.
Good luck.
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/31814/a_beginners_guide_to_anal_sex.html
https://www.goodvibes.com/Content.aspx?id=721
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A
female
reader, TL7 +, writes (23 April 2008):
 I't total bull, no woman is built for it, technically. That's just not where a dick is suposed to go. I agree with andrew, talk to himabout it. He needs to know that comparing you to other women is not going to help you warm up to it any faster.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the answers...:]
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A
male
reader, Collaroy +, writes (23 April 2008):
 Hi,
I've got a good idea. Why don't you buy a large vibrator and tell him you want to experiment. When it takes a while to insert this in his rectum start complaining that he's taking too long. Maybe he will click.
I doubt it though, it sounds like you have a very selfish lover.
His stories about the other girls are bullshit by the way.
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A
male
reader, Andrew83 +, writes (22 April 2008):
 For anal, do you try lube? if not try it, to what i know it makes it easier to enter.
You both need to sit down and talk, let him know it hurts your feelings when he compare's you to other women he's been with. Talk about other ways, you cant go off what he wants to do, there is you aswell so try to talk.
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