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Are my large breasts an impediment to finding and dating a guy? I feel my breasts are a turn-off.

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 April 2015) 16 Answers - (Newest, 17 June 2015)
A female Australia age 51-59, anonymous writes:

I have large breasts ,( an e cup )and have been single a while now . It seems to me that men don't like big breasts and actually find them a turn off.

I am beginning to feel insecure and think no man will ever want me as every guy I talk to or read about seems only interested in 'perky, small breasts'

Do any men out there even like larger breasts now days

View related questions: breasts, insecure

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A male reader, erico Nigeria +, writes (17 June 2015):

erico agony auntDear you shouldn't mind all the men who claims larger breast are turn-off. for me I love big-breasted ladies they are awesome and sexy unlike any other lady. feel great with what you got. a lot of men prefer busty ladies OK. you are awesome OK. you just haven't met right one OK. I wish you the best.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2015):

From a male perspective, I assure men don't give a hoot about the size of a woman's breasts if they like her.For me the most important factor that attracts my initial attention to a woman is her face.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (27 April 2015):

CindyCares agony aunt Large breasts are disgusting ? Since when ?!!! I did not get the memo. LOL. Oh, then THAT's why breast implants are more or less half of the surgeries plastic surgeons do ! because all women want to be disgusting and turn off men !

Wait,I know what you are going to say. That surgeon -made breasts are huge, but pert - even weirdly so , at times.

Well, it's undeniable that anything which says " young and healthy " has more visual impact of anything that suggests the idea of decay, decline, getting old. It is also undeniable that normally people aren't SCARED or DISGUSTED by some little reasonable normal wear and tear , and that men are visibly subject to it too .

For instance, don't you prefer those rock- hard, 180 ° parallel-to the body , ponting to the chin, erections,

as a 20 y. i. has- to the gummier,parallel to the floor (or worse ) erections such as your bf has too ,if he is in your age range ?

Maybe that's exactly what you should mention too next time, " My preference goes to erections which looks and feel like steel rods ,rather than half-cooked hot dogs like yours, reason for which I refuse to touch it /see it / having anything to do with it ".

The sad truth is, I suspect, that you are dating an idiot. You can dump him and let him go see if there's any pert breasted girl seeking for an idiot. Or, if being tactless is his ONLY fault ( I doubt it ) you can tell him that his comments are not being appreciated, particularly during lovemaking. And , in both cases, you have to STOP liking or disliking yourself and your body based on the individual preferences of a couple of random , rather crass guys.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2015):

I agree with the others that your current man is a jerk. I also wonder whether the guys who were putting down large breasts were trying to be mean to you or somebody else... Perhaps they thought they couldn't get a woman with large breasts so they tried to knock her down a peg.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (27 April 2015):

So_Very_Confused agony auntI have a friend who is a GG. she's a bit on the heavy side but it's mostly her boobs.

Her husband refers to them publicly as MAGNIFICENT. She wont' get a reduction because she is afraid of surgery.

IF your current bf does not like large breasts then he has two options

1. leave you for a small breasted woman or

2. STFU about it.

and you have one choice

tell him to STFU about it or leave.

then when he whines about it again you can say "I'm sorry I told you whining about this would end the relationship. be gone with you, you have no power here"

and end it.

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A male reader, CMMP United States +, writes (27 April 2015):

Honestly, if your breasts make you look overweight that may be keeping some guys away. But for every guy it turns off there will be another one who loves them.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2015):

Thanks for the replies. I wish I could say it's only my current man but on other occasions I have been with men who have praised the virtues of smal pert breasts

Even when a group of us were out a few weeks ago a couple of the men noticed a large breasted woman and one said 'gross, can you imagine how they would sag in the sack' and the other men laughed . So unfortunately although the current Man has been clear about his preference im noticing that a lot of men now seem to equate smal breast with youth and beauty and larger ones as matronly and disgusting

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (27 April 2015):

Honeypie agony auntHonestly, I think you should SWAP out your sex partner and find one who isn't being such an asshat!

HOW do you think HE would feel if you told him you preferred a BIG penis and thus will have nothing to do with his "little" one?

YOU are who you are, BIG boobs and all. And ANY man who CAN'T or rather WON'T appreciate you for WHO you are and HOW you look... DOESN'T deserve an OUNCE of you.

Kick the bugger out of bed and find yourself a REAL man.!

THAT is my advice.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2015):

OP, WHY would you be intimate with a guy like that?

Telling you that he likes small breasts when yours are large is hurtful. No tact at all.

And avoiding them during sex? Even more hurtful.

I would not be with someone like that.

My breasts are small and perky. I work out. I prefer them this way. But there is nothing wrong with larger breasts. You just have to find a man who appreciates your WHOLE PACKAGE. Not just your breasts.

You are much too focused on this one area.

Focus on all the great things about you. All the physical attributes you LIKE. Instead of the one you don't.

I think you are obsessing too much.

Plenty of guys like larger breasts. You obviously have not met the right types. Or the right one yet.

And how is it that we women are always made to feel inadequate? Especially with our physical appearance? I would like to see this guy of yours. How many flaws does he have? I highly doubt they bother him half as much.

Seems like the woman has to always be physically perfect while the guy doesn't. Talk about a double standard.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2015):

Two of my ex boyfriends loved curves like yours and mine are nothing worth writing home about. Both boyfriends were in 40's and into fitness.

So maybe we should swap as I seem to attract guys who like an ample bosom curves!

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A male reader, Garbo United States +, writes (26 April 2015):

Garbo agony auntI never heard any guy, ever, claim that a girl is undesirable because of her large breasts. If anything, it was the opposite: you may hear a dude whine about hair, this or that, but when faced with large breasts it's always "but them tits!!"

Unless you are fat and obnoxious, like Rosie O'Donnell, your breasts are a definitive attraction to any man.

Therefore, I suspect that you are scapegoating your issue on your large breasts.

A very large study, recently, concluded that much of our human (un)fortunate circumstances are derived from where we are located, meaning our geography has a lot to do with type of people we encounter. I think this conclusion is also applicable in your circumstance... So try seeking men outside your usual circle of mingling. Explore a different geography, environment and circumstances... different clubs and activities. Try to do something that you have never done before with a totally different set of people.

Let me not digress though... As a man, I want you to be assured on my word that no female breasts are big enough for any guy to find such woman unappealing.

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A female reader, janniepeg Canada +, writes (26 April 2015):

janniepeg agony auntAs a lover I would never say I prefer your body part to be the opposite of what you have. When you love a person you love the whole body. Don't be surprised thought there are men who have big breasts phobia, but they are in the minority. I don't think you have anything worry about if the only bad experience you had was with that idiot who avoided your breasts.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2015):

Ah, so you already have a small breast loving man...

My only suggestion is that you wear a really gorgeous bra during sex so that they look beautiful. Unfortunately, you can't change a man's taste, but he may grow to love and appreciate them with time. Perhaps he's a little afraid of them and isn't sure how to handle them (so to speak!). So don't push him into giving them attention and give him time to get used to them - he may well learn to love them.

All the very best of luck.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2015):

OP again , sorry but I meant to add that of anyone has any ideas on how I can feel better about my breasts especially when being intimate with a man who has told me he likes small breasts best and avoids mine during sex

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2015):

breast is a part of attraction for mens but breast size is not a big matter if a man attract to a woman emotionally and deeply from heart.and if u linked breast size with sex then a breast only play a role of erection to all mens and naked breast turns all men on for sex no matter breast is big or small.all womens in this world are beautiful. breast size not a big matter the thing only matter is man love u from heart,if he love u deeply from heart then love u with big breast,small breast and also love without breast i mean some girls have only little nipples its not mean she dnt deserve love.the main thing is love,understanding otherwise the mens who played games only for sex are greedy for this type of things i mean big breast,small breast..so dear dnt worry abt ur breast size u are beautiful,beautiful and beautiful..

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2015):

I am a DD cup, so not quite as large as you. I'm in my 50s and there are plenty of men who are attracted to my breasts! There are lots of men out there who prefer a more curvy woman. So don't fret and keep looking - you'll find someone who appreciates you and your curves.

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