A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi everyone just a quick question about Friends With Benefits (fwbs) I am currently in one with a guy I really like I was just wondering if all fwbs are usually kept secret or do people tell each other they are in one?I have asked this question because each time I see him with his friends he always talks to me, where as before he used to completely ignore me and pretend I didn't exist thank you
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female
reader, straight to the truth +, writes (29 April 2012):
Try to remember that FWB's are just friends and it is never likely to be anything more and if you really like him then you are going to end up with a broken heart. You are not IN fwb's to use this term makes it sound like you are in a relationship which you are not. you are a F**K Buddy.To be honest I had a few of these (not as once lol) it wasn't a secret but at the same time neither of us bragged about it because otherwise it just becomes disrespectful. FWB's works both ways, don't become a booty call!
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (29 April 2012):
 As Person12345 said : "If you like this guy, you should end the FWB as this will only end in heartbreak for you"
I agree 100% or more. IF you really like him all he's doing is using you sweetheart... and if speaks of you to his friends it's not about how much he likes you.... it's about how often he has sex with you...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2012): FWB 101
1. There is no commitment involved
2. She/He likes to screw...when I like to screw
3. Not obligated to take you any where...but to screw
4. Not necessary to introduce to anyone...unless you already know them
5. Don't have to explain anything
6. There is no commitment involved
7. Can see/ screw anyone else that I want to
8. Can act like you don't exsist outside of times when I want to screw
9. Don't have to consider your feelings regarding anything else
10. THERE IS NO COMMITMENT INVOLVED!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2012): Sounds as if you really would like to be his girlfriend. FWB is not that sort of deal and as such is a bit of a private arrangement.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (29 April 2012):
 A FWBs is NOT a relationship.
What would a person in a FWBs go around telling their friends???
"Hey, I've been boning (insert name here) for the past 6 months".
I'm sorry that doesn't sound like something I would go around boasting to my friends about. FWBs is no one's business but the two involved in the arrangement.
You have a sexual arrangement of where you have casual sex with each other. There's no feelings, emotions going into it. At least on his part.
Don't treat this as a relationship, when it's far from it.
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (29 April 2012):
 HiI would WANT it kept a secret, wouldnt want all and sundry knowing a man is using me for sex. Thats all he IS doing. So before you get a) a reputation for being up for itb) a broken heartStop the NSA sex.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2012): "with a guy I really like"
Oh I missed that part. You're screwed so OP. Either you ask ask him to go to the next level with you and start dating, end the arrangement or keep doing what you're doing now and waiting and hoping giving him what he wants only to get dumped when you realize if he liked you FWB's would not be enough for him.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (29 April 2012):
 If you like this guy, you should end the FWB as this will only end in heartbreak for you. I know if you like someone, this seems like the second best option, but it's really not. It's worse than not doing anything because you've made yourself vulnerable and face the same rejection.
I'd think most guys would be pretty proud to be in a situation like that, sex without strings. I'm pretty sure the only time I was in one he didn't keep it a secret, but our friends did not overlap. But sure enough, just like you, he developed feelings for me and I had to end it and he was heartbroken.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2012): I always like to proudly display the girls I'm boning to my friends when in FWB's, I only kept them secret if the girl was someone who I knew my friends just wouldn't like or wouldn't get on with.
Why do you ask? Please don't tell me you're trying to figure out whether he has real feelings or not. It's FWB's of course he doesn't. So don't let yourself get develop feelings for him or start looking for little signs in everything he does to see if he feels the same.
If he did, he would be dating you not just boning you.
So forget about questions like this, FWB's is very easy to figure out. You have sex, be nice to each other and don't get emotionally attached. Those are the rules, break any of them and you're likely to get hurt.
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