A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:How do I accept that I'm not meant to have love?I'm 30 years old and I've been in a couple of relationships, but none of them went anywhere. I've accepted that I'm not pretty, and that I can't plat "the game". Not being down on myself, but facts are facts. I feel like I need to prepare for the very real possibility that I will never find love. How can I do that?It does pain me quite a bit, because if there is anything I want in this world it's companionship, but men simply aren't attracted to me and no hobby seems to fill that void.I often feel that maybe I don't deserve love, but I don't know what makes me deserve loneliness. Like I said, I've managed to accept that I am not pretty; it's just the luck of the draw. But I'm having trouble applying that same principle to love. Any tips to help me accept that I may never find love? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (5 August 2012):
 'If you think a man is going to solve all of your problems and make you feel on-top-of-the-world for the rest of your life...think again.'
:-) :-) :-) spot on advice from Bong girl xxx
OP you could get a collection of cats, chase the neighbourhood kids with your broom and lament your pitiful situation...or
You could be glad to be alive, to live, to breathe the good air and rejoice in the pure joy of just being.
Predicting your future with such detrimental odds is enough to send you plummetting off the nearest cliff!!
Stop painting such a gloomy picture of yourself and maybe your inner beauty will shine through enough to capture that elusive lover...
Or join us single gals and discover the best kept secret to true happiness in life.
A
female
reader, BondGirl72 +, writes (5 August 2012):
 I think you are being a overly dramatic. "I am not pretty and will never find love." You will probably never find love because of your negative attitude and outlook on yourself. I'm hoping this isn't how you are in real life and actually have an optimistic outlook on life.
I also sense that you feel as if you are nothing without a man. If you would stop feeling sorry for yourself and get outside of your house and do things and meet people, you might realize how much love there really is in life. Try volunteering at an animal shelter, shelter for abused women or single moms, or a soup kitchen and see if you don't experience some love.
I have been where you are, but I didn't continue with the negative self-talk for long. If you think a man is going to solve all of your problems and make you feel on-top-of-the-world for the rest of your life...think again. That feeling of love and happiness is UP TO YOU. If you don't have it to begin with, no one else can give it to you. Right now I am thinking about all of the issues and problems all of my married friends have had and currently are having with their men. Besides, those of us who have been in love, know that people can change and so can love. Just because you find it, doesn't mean you can keep it.
Stop romanticizing and get out and do something for someone else. You won't regret it and you may change your life. And, through all of the other contacts you make, you may just find a man.
...............................
|
