A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi there. I am going to be staying alone because my fiance is going away for work for 3 nights. I have anxiety and fear being sick (it is something i have had my whole life). This fear is intensified when i am alone. It is probably worse because I live outside of the city and don't really know anyone. The anxiety is so terrible and not sure how to deal with it during those 3 days. I work from home and will be busy, which is good, but i'm still afraid.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2018): My hubby worked nights so I get it.I got a cat... well actually I got three.When you lay in bed at night have a cat with you...the purrs are calming then you are not alone.Or if you like dogs get a dog.When my kids were small they would all sleep with me.But they got older hence the cat now does.The worse was Halloween.All the cats and all the kids slept in the same bed then.
A
female
reader, mystiquek  +, writes (20 May 2018):
 My husband is from Japan and twice a year he flies back home to see his family and friends. I do not usually accompany him because I don't like to fly and the 13 hour flight is more than I can handle, so I encourage him to go alone and enjoy himself.
I am then on my own for 2 weeks. It is much better now for me but I once suffered greatly from anxiety and truly did not like being alone because it seemed to trigger panic attacks.
At one point we had moved to Boston temporarily for his job and I knew NO ONE. My family was hundred's of miles away. I dreaded those trips that he took but knew they were important for him.
I can make suggestions, I hope some of them will help you.
1. If at all possible have a scheduled time every day/night where to two of you can chat. It gave me a sense of security knowing my husband was going to call me every day.
2. Go out! Do not stay cooped up all day/night long. Go out, get some fresh air, shop. We didn't have a car but I could walk since we lived in town, or take the bus/subway. Its nice to just see and hear others.
3. Chat up with your family/friends every day.
4. Is there a chance someone can come visit with you? Can you go stay with someone? This wasn't an option for me but perhaps it is for you.
5. Can you go volunteer somewhere? You would be around other people, or animals, etc. I volunteered at an animal shelter and absolutely loved the time I spent with the animals.
6. Try a new hobby. Immerse yourself in it.
7. Leave on a radio or a television. It might comfort you to hear voices/music etc.
I hope this helps you. Its really hard suffering from this type of a situation but all of us are alone at some point or another and you need to find a way to deal with it.
I strongly. suggest getting a pet if you like animals. They can be so comforting and a dog especially takes up your time walking them ect. They bring such job and comfort to you. I always have had cats. They are wonderful companions!
Good luck and don't let your mind go into overdrive. Anxiety can take hold and not let go but only if you allow it to do so.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  +, writes (20 May 2018):
 Is there anyone who could come and stay with you for the 3 days? Perhaps a family member, or a friend?
Will you be able to skype or phone your fiance during the 3 days? If he is working during the day, then perhaps in the evening?
Do you have any hobbies you could concentrate on during the 3 evenings? Or any films or programmes you would like to watch which your fiance does not want to watch? Or a book you would like to read?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 May 2018): Get yourself a loyal pet to keep you company.
Separation-anxiety when you're totally isolated from everyone can happen to anyone; you don't really have to have anxiety-issues to feel alone and scared.
You should also see your therapist more often; or seek a new one if the one you have has been ineffective. Your anxieties should not be out of control; and if they have been, it's going to take a toll on your relationship.
If you're not healthy enough to be alone, you're not healthy enough for a full-fledged relationship. That takes maturity and calmness.
A small dog or a cat would keep you company, and distract your mind from dwelling on your anxieties. Turn on some soft music in the background to break the silence; get yourself some good books, light a few scented candles. Set the mood and atmosphere for relaxation.
You might also find yourself a part-time job to keep you busy and focused on a productive-activity. Your fiance should not be the only reason you can hold it together.
That's not what relationships are for.
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