A
female
age
41-50,
*auraxLeex
writes:Hi all, Well I need a little bt of advice so here goes. On Thursday, after a night out with the girls, I came home a little tipsy, wide awake, nothing on TV, and I decided to phone a chatline. (sad I know, but we've all been there?)Anyway, I got chatting to a few guys from near to where I live, and one Stood out.We fired a few messages back and forward and had a nice chat on the phone, so I decided to give him my mobile number, He gave a nice description of himself "Tall (6ft 5" by the way!) Dark hair, Athletic build, Handsome. Exactly my type.We sent each other photos on our phones, Clean ones of course, and he asked if I would be up for meeting him that Night. Of course I said "No" as I didn't know him well enough, and you can never be too careful!We kept texting and arranged to meet up on the saturday for a coffee anda chat. Well the afternoon out turned in to an evening out, and then the evening out turned in to a night out. We met for coffee, got chatting, there were no nerves, we were very relaxed in each others company. We went out for dinner that same evening, and then on to a pub and we ended up back at my place, where more alcohol followed, and things got rather passionate. We didn't have full sex, but near enough. We both decided, we would wait til next time, as it would be better. He left in the mornin, Gave me a kiss and a cuddle, told me He'd had a good time, and was glad we met up. I said the same back to him, I genuinely mean it too. and I think he does also. My problem.. Now he's texting me saying I drove him crazy, it was hard to hold back from something he wanted so much and he didn't want to ruin things by ging to far the first night. He asked if we could meet again and I said Yes. So we're meeting on Friday, I'm going to cook us a meal at Home and we'll watch a movie, Some quiet time to get to know each other. The thing is, I know this sound crazy, But do I sleep with him or make him wait? We Seem to have an amazing connection (although I am fully aware Lust might be clouding my judgement) On our date we were with each other from 3pm til 10am the next morning, so I guess on some level it was like 2 or 3 dates rolled into one long date, We didnt stop laughing the whole time, we talked about ourselves on a personal level, like dreams, life goals, family, etc etc. So We at least know all the essential basics about one another. I don't know if he's expecting sex, But the last time things did get pretty passionate, and I don't wanna mess up what could develop into something amazing, by giving it up too soon? I should point out we have been texting a lot since we met, had a few phone calls too. Any advice?
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female
reader, xanthic  +, writes (16 August 2010):
 I fully agree with quiet-echo, you barely know this man. Your hesitance means you already know, on some level, it's too soon to sleep with him. Right now, the most important thing is to get to know him better and be careful in doing so.
You have no idea who he really is, regardless of how personal your conversations may have been. Even at six months, people you think you know well can surprise you, and you've only known him a few days.
Take your time, let him see you for you.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2010): It depends what u want. Don't be surprised if the second date will be your last date.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (16 August 2010):
 Well, it sounds like a lot of potential fun and enjoyment, but would you be happy if it went no further? You are of ample age to enjoy some safe passion and satisfaction, and maybe it will lead to more, but perhaps a few more weeks prior to intercourse will reveal more about the potential.
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A
male
reader, LittleAlfie +, writes (16 August 2010):
 The simple fact is that withholding sex, I find, neither damages or improves the likelihood of a romantic connection. If the chemistry is there, it's there, and there's no sense in denying it. What you should focus more sharply on is the overall intent on both your parts. Do you want a relationship with this guy? Does he just want sex and nothing more? But these are things that can be difficult to determine so early on. Try discussing your hesitation. Ask him how long he's willing to wait over your dinner. And when you ask, wait for a response. Don't get so excited interject with your own opinion. It's your best shot at honesty. The longer he'll wait, the more your personal connection will improve.
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A
female
reader, Oregongrl1 +, writes (16 August 2010):
Either way if hes going to use you he will! but if he is a good guy and again either way you do or you don't he will stick around if he adores you! i think it will be a test of fake for you both! just relax and go w/ whats in your heart!
Good Luck!
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