A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes: Married 27yrs, together for 29yrs. I have been unhappy for many years. Not because he is bad, just because I think I married him for the wrong reasons. I recently moved out because I finally decided life is too short to be unhappy. Now, I'm wondering if I am doing the right thing. We just don't have anything in common and I think I'm so far gone that I can't ever get it back (if it was ever there to begin with). I'm always worried about his feelings instead of mine. I even tried to have sex with him, but felt absolutely nothing and couldn't wait for it to be over. Am I wrong to want to finalize things or should I give him another chance?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2009): finalise things, you have already decided he is not the one for you. after your divorce he can move on and meet the one true love of his life. you have made a decision that you want out. i am sure he is also hurting but release him so that he can live his life fully. there are plenty of good women out there maybe he can light someone elses fire since he is not doing anything to yours. you too can move on and find someone who will make you special again. plse do not be selfish and hang on to this good man for nothing. he deserves happiness. so do you.
A
female
reader, baby_tinney +, writes (13 June 2009):
If you go back just to make him happy it will make you both unhappy in the end.You cant put on a happy face and walk thru life or you will burst at the seems.If he really loves you he should see how unhappy you truly are and want more for you.
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A
male
reader, sean sean +, writes (13 June 2009):
it's gonna take time to move on for him it may take anuther 20 years to except Tha fact you want out ! Tha only and best way toleave is leave Tha state that way you towont see each other , and you also have to figure out y you are not happy ! then try todo wat makes you happy ! it will be very hard for to except that ! unless hees getting pussy and having a good time from anuther lady ! it's not easy for men to except Tha seperatiion !in less we have some one else occupying our time
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A
male
reader, sean sean +, writes (13 June 2009):
too late too leave , meaning you have to find things that will make you
happy as well as make him happy ! don't let those years go down Tha drain find things to do that will ignite Tha fire again
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (13 June 2009):
You're not wrong, you deserve to be happy. Also, your not wrong for possibly giving it another shot. Marriage is a design. It's not just saying "I do" and watch it go on auto pilot. Isn't it true that your unhappiness may not be do to who you're married to, rather the environment you two designed the marriage to take on? Quite often we forget about our choice to design our marriage the way we choose. We let it run its self even if that means into the ground.
I recommend some marital counseling to figure out which direction to go. The marriage may just need a different design, and this will help you decide which direction to go.
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