A
male
age
30-35,
*unksavage
writes: Ok so me and my girlfriend were really good friends before we ever started to date. she had some emotional issues with things and then she started caring for me as more than friends when she relized that i was a caring person and wanted/tried to help her through her issues which eventually i did. I eventually asked her out. its been a year now almost and we absolutely madly in love with eachother. were honestly a perfect couple we think soo much alike, but still are very different which keeps thing interesting. we communicate sooo well we actually solve our fights before they actually turn into fights by listening to eachother and understanding how the other feels about the situation then we comprimise so both partys are happy. i literally cannot think of anything wrong with this girl. im 100% positive that she is the one. im thinking about marrying her sometime in the next couple of years if everything keeps perpetuating the way it is. my question is am i too young to think about marriage. im 19 now im thinking maby 20, or 21 is when id ask her is that too young. id really like to ask her now but id like to wait to see if everything carries on the way it is. Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2011): To be honest your not too young, im only 20 and am married, when i was still 19, i said i would marry you, yes i have taken the risk of divorce but if you can commit to her then go for it
A
female
reader, Lorelai +, writes (22 December 2011):
The thing I always ask is, what's the rush? If you know you're going to spend the rest of your life together why do you feel like you need to get married right now?
I think you should wait. Just stay together, be happy and you'll know when the right time to ask is, family and friends will start making hints about when you're going to pop the question and you won't need to come on here asking us if you're ready. Just enjoy the time you're together, save for a house if you like, move in together after school when you have a nice steady job and things will work out.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123 +, writes (22 December 2011):
What you have with your girlfriend is great. Enjoy the dating phase and all the fun, enjoy your time with her.
While its not too soon to get married, give it a few years more. If she is yours for keeps, then it will only make your relationship stronger.
Dating is great fun but marriage is a whole different thing altogether. There are innumerable responsibilities and you need to be financially stable before you take the leap. You're lucky to have a partner for life, now work towards your career, financial security and all the responsibilities that come with marriage. Only then think about it
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt +, writes (22 December 2011):
Maturatity is not an age thing. In other words once you hit say 22, you don't wake up one morning with new eyes to see the world through. I know 50 year old people that are too dumb to feed themselves. ust keep waiting you'll know when it's right.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2011): No you're not too young and I can see nothing wrong with with the way you're going about this. But yeah, keep it to a wait and see.
If in 1 or 2 more years you still feel this way then why not? Sit on the idea and let it grow but don't rush into it based on the glow of your love at the moment. You still have another couple of years to see if your lives continue on together or take different paths, career-wise etc.
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A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (22 December 2011):
I'm not keen on people marrying young.... it often ends in divorce, because as people get older they can change, they can want different things and they can grow apart. At 19,20,21 your still growing, emotionally, physically and mentally.
Of course your not to old to think about marriage, your sure she is perfect and you both get on as friends and as soulmates. That's great.
I suggest you date for a couple of years, and then have at least another year engagement.. that will be more than enough time to work out any problems, make sure that this is the woman you want to be with for life. Spend the time dating/engaged to plan exactly what you want your married life to be like and how you will work together to solve problems that occur. Spend the time learning together and experiencing life with few responsibilities.
Also, have fun, if she's the one, she's not gonna run, and marriage isn't going anywhere.. marriage is for life remember.
Congratulations in finding the right woman and knowing she's the one.. that doesn't happen to everyone.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (22 December 2011):
It sounds like you have the best start of all, with the great communication between you. Many couples never attain that, even as they get older. So I'd say you aren't too young to be committed. If you share similar work ethics, views on life and energy and education levels, you're off to a great start!
I think your plan of waiting a year or two sounds reasonable and will give you even more time to establish as a couple.
Good luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2011): Everyone is ready for commitment at different times, and so only you know if it's right for you.
I know how it feels to be ready so young - I'm only 21 and have been thinking about it within my long term relationship. Just because you may propose to her at 21 doesn't necessarily mean you'll be married at 21.
Just be sure that you know it's right. Marriage is meant to be for life, and divorce is expensive.
Have you talked to your girlfriend about it? how does she feel?
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