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Am I making too much of this

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Question - (25 May 2022) 5 Answers - (Newest, 28 May 2022)
A female Australia age 51-59, *toneruby writes:

Hi. Just seeking thoughts as to whether Im overreacting to my current working situation. A week into my new job I have just found out that my boss,35,33 at the time, was charged and went to court because he was caught hiding in the cubicle of the female toilets of a nightclub spying over the top on a woman whist using it. Never went to jail as I read it, a suspended sentence was given. While I understand his past is his past but if Im to be honest It really weirds me out knowing and Im not sure if I want to keep working there. Thank you for taking the time to answer

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A female reader, Stoneruby Australia +, writes (28 May 2022):

Stoneruby is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Stoneruby agony auntHi Kenny. Good question. This is a family run business and they have no issue with them and mates coming and going out the kitchen, totally annoys me being its a safety issue and interruption, but not my place to bring it up I thought- anyway...I was standing back faced to the door when someone put their two hands on my shoulders and proceeded to give me massage! I kinda let out a Whoa, as in wtf, shrugging it off. It was one of his mates. So,just out of curiosity I tried looking up the boss on FB to see his friends list to see who this dude was and it went from there, a google search and the news reports came from there. It was probably nothing sinister, but IMHO not cool or ok. I since left and have a new job to go to next week-YAY! @ Honeypie, Funny I thought the same thing about spywear in the loo too

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (26 May 2022):

Honeypie agony auntYeah, I get you. That is some grade A creepy shit to do! And he was 33 - so a WHOLE grown-ass man at the time, one who KNEW better but didn't ACT better.

I would feel uncomfortable using the restroom at work. Not because I think he might peep but he might have gotten smarter and now use tech to spy on women.

Now it could have been a ONE-time incident and he KNEW the woman (GF and he thought she was cheating - still not a good reason to spy on someone in the restroom tho). I simply don't see ANY excuse as to why what he did was OK. Ever.

I'd 100% agree with Kenny, LINE up a new job asap, and then quit when you have a new job.

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (26 May 2022):

kenny agony auntJust following on from my earlier answer I know in your post you said you read about the incident. I was wondering what made you look that up to find this information about your boss. After only being in the job for only a week, I was just assuming that someone must have informed you, then making you go and investigate the situation from two years ago further.

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A female reader, Stoneruby Australia +, writes (26 May 2022):

Stoneruby is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Stoneruby agony auntHi Kenny. Thanks for taking the time to reply. I found out not by word of mouth, rather I googled his name and it came up on several news reports with the court findings. Im always polite, I have no reason not to be. Ive decided Im leaving after tonight, they have family (business) and mates coming and going into my work space which is bothersome but none of my business BUT when one of them (male) thinks its ok to walk up behind me puts both hands on my back and briefly massaging it....I just responded with some ridiculous 'whoa' sound and moved forward and ignored him. Not a big deal I suppose but just not cool or ok.

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (26 May 2022):

kenny agony auntHow did you come by this kind of information about an incident that happened two years ago, only a week into your new job?.

If someone told you, like another co-worker it could just be malicious gossip from someone who has issues with him.

I am kind of leaning torward's someone divulging this information to you via word of mouth, because it seems like you only found out this a week into you job being unaware before you started.

Whether it is true or not, you are there to do a job, be pleasant and polite to everyone, then go home.

If your going to believe its true, and after a week you can't stand being there then maybe get another job. But If your going to go down this path I would stay there until you have another job lined up.

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