A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hey Agony Aunts thanks in advance for reading my question and any help you can give.So here goes, I really like this guy we text and phone each other all the time from morning to night, all days including weekends we have spent some time alone together although to be honest nothing you would call a proper date. There are times when I don't hear from him for hours when he is out with his friends which is fine but he kinda expects to hear from me always no matter what I'm doing.My question is do you think he's really interested or do I fill his time when he's not with his mates or whatever is he just using me?
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2012): I think you are the equiv of a replacement Mom. He uses you to feel so not alone; its abandonment issues and emotionally abusive to have an unrealistic expectation for someone to be on hand and foot yet won't keep the same standard himself.
I don't think this is a loving or romantic relationship of any kind.
A man in love makes the effort to woo a woman.
Agreed with Cerberus though- only way to know for sure is to speak to him about.
And may I say you yourself haven't mentioned if you have romantic feelings for him either.
Odd.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2012): He's interested in your time OP, it doesn't seem like he's interested in much more than that.
But the only person who can tell you what the deal is, is him.
This is a bit full on if you ask me, that's a lot of "checking in".
It's time you sat him down and had a chat about what is going on here. First figure out what you want from him and then just talk to him about this.
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A
female
reader, CollegeCutie +, writes (7 January 2012):
 you guys are not exclusive so if you feel like hes using you to fill his time then dont fill it. if your with ur friends and dont want to text him back dont. he gets angry? ask him y? just be like i was busy what is he expecting you to say. i dont think you're expecting to much you give him the time with his friends and let him be why shouldnt he do the same for you. HE cant use you to fill his time if you dont let him. ur choice.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (7 January 2012):
 I think you are expecting way to much here, you do not hear from him for a few hours because he is with friends and you put this down to him not being interested. This is not normal behaviour, it is only early days for you, so he should be able to go out and not have to worry about texting you. However it does swing both ways and you say he expects to have your attention all of the time. This is wrong on so many levels. It is still early days, so if you want to go out with your friends then turn of your phone and do so. They still deserve to have your attention and time, if he is expecting to much well then talk to him about it, but on the other hand you are also expecting to much. This is not healthy you both need to let go a bit or else things will never work.
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