A
female
age
36-40,
*beckyz0818
writes:I work for a mostly all male company with a female accounting office. I am the only woman in office under 30 and have been working there for 3 years. I have been noticing lately that my boss, our company president, has been treating me differently compared to the other employees. I have noticed that he goes out of his way to say hello and goodbye to me when he is in the office, even if it is just to come over to my cubicle when I haven't said hi to him. He loves to tease me mercilessly. He high fives me all of the time or pats my shoulder. All of our meetings, he sits across and stares at me. If it is a manager meeting (all men), he always occupies the seat next to me. I know a lot about his personal life because he likes to talk to me. He likes to complain to me about things and i listen. He goes out of his way to help me, even if it is just to bring me coffee or buy me lunch. If I pass by him, he instantly turns to face me and says hi. He has a nickname for me and once in a while calls me his personal smart ass. He means it as something endearing.He has shown signs of jealousy. A supervisor has made it obvious that he is interested in me and my boss has stated that this supervisor is one of the three people he can't stand. He warned me not get involved with the guy. Another time, a man who worked in the building next door had a crush on me and bought me flowers for a month. I wasn't interested and told him so. My boss came to me and said that he knew that I was capable but that he offered to help me get rid of the guy if he continued to bother me. He doesn't like to see me sad. He has offered to beat someone up for me if I wanted him to so that he could see smile. I have cried in his presence once from being in pain because I was ill and he took me to his office to calm down and made me tea. The day after I had a car accident, I returned to the office and he was very worried, asking if I was ok and sent me home early to rest.The owner's assistant has declared me the president's favorite because he actually listens to me when I tell him to do something. A fellow coworker has accused me of having a "love affair' with the boss after I gave him a Christmas present. I gave him a pair of reading glasses to repair the ones he lost. He is much older than me and has been divorced for eleven years. He is single as am I and I sometimes wonder that if I didn't work for him, he would have asked me out. Our interactions are limited to the office because I believe that he is aware that it would be inappropriate to do anything outside of work and because he has stated that he is too old, even though that to me doesn't matter. Our office has called us the married couple because of the way we deal with each other.Any advice would be welcomed.
View related questions:
affair, christmas, co-worker, crush, divorce, flowers, jealous, my boss Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2012): This sounds very similar to an experience I had where my higher boss started showing an interest in me with his flirting. He started to grow on me too. Many people meet at work and many successful relationships come out of them.
You need to ask the guy out right if he is interested in going out with you some time and ask him outright. Tell him you are interested. If he makes excuses you will know that he is in a relationship. If the relationship does move to the next level, you may want to find another job. hings will get difficult for you working together with people talking and thinking you are getting favoured.
If he is in a relationship and continues to flirt, do not encourage it as you will get hurt and may even lose your job.
Good Luck.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2012): Yes, he's attracted to you but something is standing in the way of him wanting to take it further. It's not that you work for him because men do that all the time, and everyone already assumes it's true.I suspect he is in a relationship. Many men can flirt in the office all day and then shut that off when they go home to their significant other. Age difference and that you work together won't deter a single man from mixing business with pleasure. It may be the ultimate factor in whether he upgrades what you have outside the office to a relationship though. This is probably why he told you he's too old for you but what he meant was you are too mentally and psychologically young for him and perhaps he doesn't want to use you that way.I think you are his personal favorite, his pet, and he finds you more attractive than anyone else in that office for what that's worth to you. At the end of the day, he has a whole personal life you are kept apart from and that's how he wants it. I would suggest you do the same and certaintly don't let your infatuation with your boss hold you back from finding love. You have had this conversation with him and he's stated he's too old. He's put up a boundary and it's not about whether you agree with his excuse, it's the mere fact he's given one. When a man can't truly resist you, he won't. This man can. A man who feels you are the one, a woman he can fall for, you won't hear excuses, he won't resist you, and you won't have to wait and wonder.
...............................
A
male
reader, Dodds  +, writes (26 February 2012):
 Sounds like you have a big crush on this guy but from experience work place romances are very murky and tricky waters to try and manoeouvre, I'd advise against it but you're a big girl capable of making you're own decisions
...............................
|
