A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been talking to this guy for over a year now. In the beginning it was great but then I did what I always do when someone got too close I ran. I told him I liked his friend and did not want to have a relationship with him which was a lie. After a few months I realized that no matter how hard I tried I couldn't get over him. But it was too late. He now had a girlfriend. Despite this I told him that I liked him and I was just afraid in the beginning. He was confused and wondered why I came back. I lost his trust and i'm still trying to get it back. Over the last couple of months we've been getting closer but he still had his girlfriend. He said they're not togther anymore but when I talk about our relationship he avoids it. He has been telling everyone we are going out but he hasn't even ask me out yet. His ex-girlfriend is still on his top 8 and it says he is in a relationship. My question is, am I getting played?
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male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (22 October 2007):
 Its hard to blame him as you seem so unsure of yourself and he is probably trying to protect himself from getting hurt.
At the end of the day though, nobody is winning in this situation. You have got to exude more self confidence otherwise you are bound to repeat these mistakes again.
By the way, don't you find it slightly immoral chasing after a guy when you know he has a girlfriend already? He will have this in the back of his mind - you have already said you fancied his friend, now you are trying to steal another girl's boyfriend. It doesnt look great on the surface.
A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (21 October 2007):
 Nope, I think he is overly cautious. You told him you liked his friend. I'd be wondering, how long until she finds another friend to be attracted too. I think he is confused of when your behavior is going to retract and you'll withdraw from him again.
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