A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I am so confused!! In the last week i gave a guy a blow job and made out with another guy who has a girlfriend! I dont really try these things but i like both of these guys and they came on to me. Would i be considered a slut?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2007): hey hunnie.
dnt worry about what anybody thinks.
live life as you want to live it.
after all you only get one life.
dont mess it up though.
dont get a reputation.
no you arnt a slut either.
just watch out for the guys who arnt single.
hope i helped.
x.x.x.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2007): I think you would be considered a girl who was willing to get involved with a guy physically without an emotional and physical commitment back from him. People use the word 'slut' so derisively that I think it clouds the picture. The point isn't what other people will think of you, it is how your life will be affected. You say you cared about both of these guys, and I'm sure that is true. It sounds like you considered the physical intimacy an expression of your emotional attachment/connection to them, which most people think is good, BUT ... (there's always a but when it sounds like you're hearing what you want) ... It seems unlikely those boys viewed it in the same way. That's the kicker with love/sex/heartache. Reciprocity matters so very much. So instead of thinking about what others will think of you and your behavior, why not just spend some time thinking about your values and how you want to be treated by those you care about - what you want from boys in your life, and what you think are the best attitudes and behaviors to get those things? My guess is you'll find that the best things you can do for yourself and your future love life will be to foster (1) good self-confidence (maybe through sports?), (2) independence (don't worry too much about what others think), (3) a willingness to turn down what seems okay because it might distract you from finding what's truly *great*, and (4) a belief that you deserve all of this and more.
Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2007): Hi hunny
Well i'm sure you know that making out with a guy who already has a girlfriend wasn't the brightest thing to do even if you do like him. He is not a faithful boyfriend if he does stuff with other girls while he's got a girlfriend so he's not worth fancying to be honest. How would you feel if you were his girlfriend? As for the other guy if he's single and your single then you're not really a slut but don't get yourself a bad reputation. It will make people find it more difficult to trust you. If you let this be a one off thing then don't worry but if you do this again, i wouldn't be suprised if you do get a bad reputation but then you will have only yourself to blame. You say these guys came on to you but you have the choice of stopping it. Be careful
Christina xxx
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A
female
reader, Astrid +, writes (18 May 2007):
ur too young for sex, it's not just a game men can try to use u up if ur so open minded or liberated so take care or in a a month u'll get an easy-girl reputation darling, so not panic just slow down, men r double sided most time they tell u it's ok but then go and tell the blokes ur easy so that all cranky guys come round to ask u 4 sex things and then give u slut label, life is pityfully like this on the other side if u get a bad reputation it will be hard for u to get somebdy who really loves u. u see... darling, take care and unless u move town an even so the reputation may follow u and even damage u at work etc, be very very carefullove
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A
male
reader, Yos +, writes (18 May 2007):
You should be careful doing things with guys who are not single. If you get a reputation for being willing to do things with guys who already have girlfriends then it might be hard for your female friends to trust you. Stick to single guys and you'll cause less trouble all-round.
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (18 May 2007):
I don't think it matters what other people think...how do you feel about it? As long as you are comfortable with it then it doesn't matter what people call you.
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A
female
reader, Just a Girl... +, writes (18 May 2007):
huni why does it matter wat any1 else thinks?? the question is did u think that yur a slut for doin this?? if you didnt then wats the problem?? stop worrying how others feel! its your life and only you have to live with wat u do hunixxxx
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit +, writes (18 May 2007):
Some might consider you a slut.
Some might consider you sexually liberated.
Some might consider you just making excuses.
Some might consider you the "other" woman.
Only you can decide what you are going to think of yourself.
You can only choose your actions, but you cannot choose the consequences of those actions. You can not choose how others are going to interpret your behaviors in your benefit. THey will see you in their own way that benefits them.
-FBK
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A
female
reader, candy852 +, writes (18 May 2007):
yes you would how old are you? some what a slut not really soo try not to give guys a blowjob so much because that is preety slutty
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