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Am I a horrible person because I told all of his girlfriends what he does?

Tagged as: Cheating, Friends, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (24 December 2010) 4 Answers - (Newest, 24 December 2010)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I've heard of second chances but never 14th chances.. Me and my "Friend" have been "Friends" for about 2 years roughly 3. We went out for about 6 months till we broke up then he started getting with girls that were frieds of ours. He made me mad that he could do that to me..

We started talking again around chirstmas time because of my mom and he still had a girlfriend. He kissed me then he said he would leave her.. I completly expeceted him to be lying and what? he did. The day she came back from vactation he told me "I still have feelings for her,i mean i love both of you"

At this point i was like screw you leave me alone. Then he would start texting me out of nowhere trying to get her mad and jealous. i Felt very used.

Me and him stopped talking for awhile and i didn't feel comfortable moving on so i was working on me.. We ran into eachother when i was with my sister and a few friends. He then after ignoring me for 3 months texted me and said "My foot hurts" So i was thinking.. really no talking for 3 months and thats the first thing you wanna say?! Really?!

we started talking and he told me he had gotten a different girlfriend.. i was like nice thanks for saying so.. I found out it was a girl i trusted with alot of stuff when i was getting over him only to find out she told him everything.

We kept me and him quite.. I made very horrible choices and he cheated on his girlfriend..alot..every friday to be honest. I felt horrible and he broke up with her. So i was waiting for my turn to be with him again.

It never came.. a year and a half later he has a new girlfriend and im still waiting for my "Turn"

I know i was dumb for letting it get this bad,but i feel like my whole life is ruined because of this one guy.. And to be honest he is still cheating on his girlfriend. with 2 people. Me and his ex. I'm the only one that knows. He keeps saying he isn't and i'm the only person he has ever had sex with..

im not stupid,his friends and family take my side and tell me everything.

He has Slept with me,Both of his ex's sence me,His current girlfriend,and some girl that is ugly and i kicked her ass for it since she thought she was "Hot"..hahaa i lold

Anyways to my question... Am i a horrilbe person for telling all of the girls what he has done? i'm over the fact that he lied but i will never trust him. What should i do if they think im lying? i know im not.. help?..

View related questions: broke up, his ex, jealous, text

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (24 December 2010):

Honeypie agony auntJealous much?

Honey, stop messing with people in HIS life and LIVE your life. If he makes you so upset and make you feel like you HAVE to hurt other people to get back at him, it's time for you to step away. Stop talking to this guy, move on.

Or you will become the horrible person you are affraid of becoming.

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A male reader, Frank B Kermit Canada +, writes (24 December 2010):

Frank B Kermit agony auntYes, you are exhibiting the behaviors of a horrible person.

You are act out to hurt others when they have done nothing to you.

You judge people for the way they look, and got violent with at least one person who did not deserve it.

You do not even call him a bf...you call him a "friend". That tells me you have some sense of entitlement of his being devoted to you, when there was no commitment publicly established.

You need to come to terms with your deep rooted anger, or the path you are on, will destroy any potential for an emotionally healthy future.

-Frank

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (24 December 2010):

By the way, I don't think you're horrible. I just think you're being naive and blind. Open your eyes.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (24 December 2010):

I'm afraid that you're fast turning into a bunny boiler here, and it doesn't become you.

You've been cheating with this guy, listening to every lie, and yet rather than do the right thing stop cheating with him, you've continued to be apart of his cheating, and you AND he have left a trail of broken hearts. You even actually fell as low as to claim one girl was ugly, and promptly kicked her ass for it and laughed at her. Why? For what? A guy who couldn't even care that you exist.

Instead of breaking hearts and laughing at other people, why don't you try cutting contact with this guy and just moving on? Why subject yourself to the pain of being with a guy who is turning you into a joke, and someone that others will judge harshly? Why cheapen yourself by selling out to a guy who is just out to use you?

Do the right, intelligent thing and just cut this guy and all those other broken hearts from your life. He's not the one ruining your life. You are ruining it yourself by hurting people, by letting him casually use you and not moving on.

You're going to acquire a very bad reputation if you don't move on now. And believe me, it's a reputation that you don't want. In the future, decent men will run a mile from you, and women will just think that you'll hurt them.

Get rid of this guy, stop blaming him for wrecking your life, stop hurting other people and start over.

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