A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:This might come across as being a confused question.I am in a loving gay relationship for one year and a half and my partner has alot more sexual experience and has had many relationships with many people, some that weren't sexually intimate other long term ones were.Sometimes he refers to his past and to his ex partners in conversations and is friends with some of his short term ex's, when we started dating he said he didn't want to know about my past nor my ex's as he doesn't like the idea of thinking other people with me.I was fine with it, because I don't really have a major past as he had.I had a serious long distance relationship of 3years and I have had several flings, which weren't relationships however bonds developed from there, whereas he has had lots of flings.I have only been intimate with one person because I feel that I want to be fully intimate with someone when I feel everything is right. "yes i know some might say how naive, but that is how I am"With my flings they did not involve sex but we were sexual.He wants to know about my past but I am worried that I will sound like an amature, or perhaps the image that he has of me being innocent, and he knows that I have had other relationships, I am worried if he feels in the end that I have been with others..etc.There are times when he constantly refers to an ex and I have moments where I want to drop names and say things about my ex's so he can see it's not only him that has a past but i don't because I know it will hurt him because he is sensitive like that.What do I do?Do I come across as being an idiot?Some might say that I have no experience or how could I have not had more sex with people but that is how I am. I am infact very sexual in terms of foreplay and excitement.Am I a fool for not having more sexual partners?Will my partner think that I am no longer innocent?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, AvgGuy1  +, writes (10 June 2010):
If his bringing up past partners makes you uncomfortable... then you need to TELL him that. Plain and simple. It sounds like HE doesn't really want to hear about YOUR past... you shouldn't have to put up with a barrage of his past exploits either.
Now, if he was in an LTR, expect to hear a little about that ex - in one form or another.
A
female
reader, petina1 +, writes (8 June 2010):
 In any relationship I think we like to know that we havent had many partnerships. How can we feel like we are 'the one' if that is the case. We also don't want to know about other ex's either. Too many relationships mean that a certain commitment is lacking. Hopefully if the relationship means the world, the past ones will fade and die. You are not an idiot, just choosy. Your partner will like that. Hope this helps.
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