A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: hello i am here once again, as i always do if i have a problem and know you agony aunts and uncles put my mind at rest, how would you take this, me and my man of 2 year go out with a couple of other couples, so they is six of us that go out, have a drink sometimes a meal and yes the women chat and the men chat odd time we all chat together, my man has known these friends a few years and i just got introduced to them about a year ago, but with it been a LDR dont get to go out a lot with the couples its a excuse to celebrate something like a birthday so its not like its every week, me and my man see each other best we can are committed and all that, he loves me and cares for me, and i am looking to move up to be nearer him, i feel this is why i feel like i do cause i just want to be with him now sick of the distance and he his too, but getting back to the nights out, at the end of the night odd couples go home, and this is the bit i dont like the kiss goodbye they all do, not really use to it, and not sure i like my man kissing the other two women while there men give me a peck goodbye i just dont like it its not a long lingering kiss its a peck on the cheek, but then i think to myself i hope he dont enjoy her kiss, and start to like her in another way, am i been silly is this just a little peck to say had a good night and enjoyed your company that his friends do with each other, i have asked my man does he fancy or has anything ever gone on with them the women he knows but one certain one he has been friends with longer i asked him more about he says no as always been a plotonic relashioship of knowing them the women he pecks good bye, he has said nice enough lass but likes them in a friend way nothing else, its like kisses all round at the end of the night, am i being silly, my head though can think allsorts sometimes then i get all upset then when i start to think things, please any advice
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2011): THANKS FOR YOUR REPLYS, i will just have to try and relax more when we all give our friendly kiss good bye after our night out, and know it dont mean anything at all, just a friendly kiss, thanks again and yes i am probably jelous and not confident person really, that you have hit the nail on the head with, i must admit the women after they had got a peck from my man, came over to me for a kiss on the cheek too, so your both right with you answers just a friendly peck, long as it stays on the cheek and not move to the lips i will be fine even if its just a peck i wouldnt like my man kissing someone on the lips, thanks again for your replys.
A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (26 July 2011):
Yes, frankly it is silly, - paranoid in fact.
I dislike too this cheek-pecking habit- that where I live, in Italy, is a frenzy, everybody is constantly kissing everybody ,you'd really go nuts if you were here. In fact, I hate it. I like to maintain my physical boundaries and to be affectionate only with people I know , so I do my best to dodge these showers of kisses diplomatically, or , when it's impossible I'll smile and say, sorry, I don't kiss,it's a quirk of mine.
BUT, that's me. If other people want to kiss each other that's cool. It does not mean anything, it's not flirtatious or sexy or coy or sleazy . It's just a ( silly ) habit, an innocuous social fad. Your partner is not going to be erotically "zapped" by a one -sec peek on the cheek ... and if you fear that this can happen, well, maybe your general self confidence needs some tuning up?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2011): This does just seem like a social thing, I wouldn't worry about it. For some people its a pretty common custom, just like some friends greet each other with hugs etc. I kiss my close friends all the time, and my relatives, I never think of it as meaning anything 'more' than just a greeting. You might get used to it as you get to know them all better, but if you really don't like it, just step back a bit from the group when you are getting up to leave or something,just wave good bye or shake hands, what ever you are more comfortable with, and don't allow them to kiss you.
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