A
female
age
51-59,
*ules72
writes:Hi all,The other day, I mentioned to my partner that I want to buy a laptop, but he is not happy with this idea, as he says I will only use it to chat to other guys because that is all women do on computers! I have tried to convince him without much success but he says within one year of owning it, I will run off with someone else. I cannot seem to convince him. Should I just leave that idea alone or buy and hide?? Thank u all in advance x Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Miamine +, writes (15 June 2010):
 lol.. I think you won that battle.. stay strong and win the war.. :)
A
female
reader, Jules72 +, writes (15 June 2010):
Jules72 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanx miamime, incidently, he wanted 'a night off' last night, so he wouldn't have known what i was doing anyway! And then phones me this a.m. 2 say he had a 'fantastic' night last night? No mention of the laptop?! Confused.com!!
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A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (15 June 2010):
Sorry honeypie, the man is a manipulative fool.. don't buy into his bullcrap... your here talking to us and getting yourself some advice, you can now read the newspaper online, take courses, play games, research your favourite hobby or subject...
How he worked out that all that computer power is just for dating and flirting I will never know..
As has been said, ignore, ignore, ignore, have fun and let the little man tire himself with talking to the back of your head...
pppfff... porn is different... he's a manipulative man, you can't win an argument with him, so don't ever start. Totally irrational, controlling and unfair...
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A
female
reader, Jules72 +, writes (14 June 2010):
Jules72 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionVery true quiet echo.. although he says "men use computers for porn and women use computers to meet and get chatted up by men" (from his experiences) but I certainly wouldn't put anything past him! So, yes, I'm going to enjoy my purchase and not worry what he's doing for a change!!
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (14 June 2010):
 Tell him that talking to other guys is not cheating. And that he needs to trust you! He can not lock you up and he does not get to decide who you talk to either.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2010): when he says that, say "no, you know it isn't, but if thats something you've come to believe then i'd like you to explain why?"
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (14 June 2010):
 It's called a double standard, and you'd best get used to it if you want to stay in this relationship.
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A
female
reader, Jules72 +, writes (14 June 2010):
Jules72 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhi miamine i just bought the nemesis! Hes not happy bout it. e don't want me talking 2 anyone, friends, any kind of networking sites, which brings me onto another question. I challenged him about porn and faking and he said its different cos hes not making contact with them? But by me talking 2 others online, there is a risk of me straying. I cant seem 2 win the argument! How can talking 2 someone male/female b worse than what he does??! Thanx again 4 all the comments x
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A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (14 June 2010):
Don't back down honeypie.. 21st century, without a computer you become illiterate and cut off from this world.. what can he do but shout.. ignore it (sorry him) and come on Dear Cupid and play with us instead..
I'm expecting an update from you when you get this new computer.. :)
PS: I'm pretty good with computers, like some of the other aunts, so if you need help with any technical things, then just give us a shout...
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (14 June 2010):
Enjoy the freedom of opera and firefox (unless you go for a mac, in that case: enjoy safari)!
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A
female
reader, Jules72 +, writes (14 June 2010):
Jules72 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanku for all your replies, very much appreciated. Very true Casey.live, he does lots of porn and other naughty stuff on his computer, so yeah, I don't see how he can complain!! Thanks again everyone, PC World here I come! x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2010): Sounds like it takes one to know one, I'd check HIS Internet history
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (13 June 2010):
Just buy one and tell him not to control you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2010): He is behaviour is controlling, don't let him do that to you, if you want a laptop buy one, you don't have to ask his permission. He is your husband not your jailer.This man doesn't own you. No don't keep it a secret, a marriage should be open and trusting.
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (13 June 2010):
This is one of the silliest things ever. Buy the laptop. And as Jmtmj said: he cam go jump in a lake if he doesn't like it. He's dating you, he doesnt OWN you. If he doesn't like who you are and what you do, he needs to find a new girlfriend. But the laptop and find a boyfriend that can respect that you have a life. He is too insecure to be in a relationship if he can't handle you having a laptop.
And no, he is not allowed to check your history on the laptop or snoop around. Put passwords on it. If he can't respect it you know what you need to do.
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (13 June 2010):
 Wow... that's just silly... wheres the trust? Buy the laptop and tell him if he doesn't like it he can jump in a lake.
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