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*abbie
writes: I work in the salon of a store and this guy that I hung out with twice works in the clothing part of the store. We hung out one night and we made out and he told me I was so gorgeous, and all this stuff how he wanted me so bad. We hung out until like 4 AM that night.The next night we hung out again after work but this time I ended up staying at his house and it was great. He's all I can think of. But when we are at work he acts so different. Even before he really knew me he always acted like a jerk, but out of work he was soo sweet to me. But now it's been like a week and he hasn't said anything about it.I don't know how to bring up to subject of what we are. "Did you just want some ass?" And if so, you think he would pick someone he'd have to see like every day? Or is he just a dumb guy that doesn't know what he wants? I'm so confused and I've fallen hard for him. :(
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2005): hmmm..men are the hardest people to understand..dont make him see it is bothering you he..if he wants to be with you he will come running when he thinks he has lost you.
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female
reader, xixi +, writes (14 October 2005):
Sometimes guys can be so selfish and self-serving with no regard to girls’ feelings. This guy, unfortunately, just wanted you for sex, not a relationship. And yes, he was too dumb to think about the consequences of working with you every day. I think we women fall for the sweet-talker too often and end up broken-hearted and used. Oh well, chalk it up for experience and move on. There’s not much point in discussing the issue with an idiot like that. But if it will make you feel good, tell him off about what a jerk he is…after work, of course. While you’re both at work, try your best to pretend like he doesn’t exist. Maybe make him feel like YOU were the one who used him!
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reader, pops +, writes (14 October 2005):
He's more likely a dumb guy who doesn't know what he wants, and doesn't know what to do next. Talk to him. If you enjoyed the evening, tell him and thank him. Let him know you are interested in being more than a one night stand. That may break loose whatever has got his tongue.
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male
reader, Jimmy +, writes (14 October 2005):
It would seem to me that he has the same problem as many guys. He probably does love you but when he's at work, he feels that he has to act in a way where he won't lose the respect of his workmates by acting too soppy around you, because he will be accused of being 'under the thumb'.
If he's a real arse to you at work then you aught to tell him to grow up. The thought of losing you may scare him into watching the way he acts. He should get the strength to be honest about his feelings and that should mean that he should be honest in front of everyone, not just when he's alone with you.
Of course, there is the point of being slightly more reserved whilst at work but this shouldn't mean that he has the right to act like this towards you.
Hope this helps,
Best,
Jimmy
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