A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My ex boyfriend has emailed me saying he gets scared with relationships and stuff and that he has applied to work abroad for 18 months. He told me how much he would earn and come back with. He also told me he had had his mobile phone stolen. He said I was a fantastic woman and that he loved our holiday together. There were also lots of kisses within the email.I split with him because I was unhappy with his drinking and found out he took cocaine on a regular basis. This in itself caused mood swings and he was going downhill physically.He doesnt have a property of his own and is living with his parents at nearly age 40.My question is why email after 6 weeks of no contact to tell me how great I am, what his plans are to tell me he loved our holiday together.I still have feelings for him and wonder whether I should tell him or not?
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all the replies. I dont think I will tell him how I feel just wish him best for the future.
A
female
reader, Stayc63088  +, writes (21 November 2010):
 Maybe he just wanted to tell you he is getting his life together to try and get another shot with you. Maybe he is just trying to have you in his life in some capacity. we can't really tell you the reason why, we aren't him or even know him. I wouldn't tell him you still like him. Keep talking to him and make sure he has changed, that he's off the drugs, that he now has a life, before telling him that and possibly getting back together. I've had unemployed-while-dating ex's come back around saying they are now rolling in money, trying to be impressive for what they lacked before, saving face maybe. Also had ex's come back saying they have "changed", the relationship was hard for such and such reason but things are different now... It never is. Talk to him and give it time before jumping back in. You'll probably get sucked back into the same crap you broke up over in the first place. I always say there was a break up for a reason.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe didnt break up with me I ended it. I dont understand why he has emailed?
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female
reader, FloridaCatGirl +, writes (21 November 2010):
 Did you ask your boyfriend where he had been for the last 6 weeks... and what kept him from calling or visiting you? Unless he was in the hospital, you should not get back together with him. Could he have been in jail?
This man has a serious drug (cocaine & alcohol) problem that he needs to get professional help with. It is destroying his body, his savings, his relationships, and probably his job performance.
I don't have a problem with a man living with his elderly parents if they are in need of his help... but this isn't the case. He has moved home because he has spent all his money on drugs and he can't afford to live elsewhere. His life is in shambles... and things won't get any better until he kicks his drug habit.
That's great that he has found a job, but it probably won't last long if he is still abusing drugs. Besides, many companies require random drug testing. I wouldn't commit to any type of relationship with this man until he deals with his addiction.
Let us know what happens! Good luck!
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2010): Maybe He wanted to break up with you in a slow way to not hurt your feelings.Dont tell him you feelings for him thaqt will make things much worse he will become clingy to you.Best wishes xxx
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