A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: After 5 yrs together my boyfriend seems to have gone off me. I look the same and am the same person. We were so close once although we have had problems but now he says he no longer loves or fancies me but then at other times he shows me affection and initiates sex. He describes sex with me as really good and then at other times says he does not enjoy it. He has been going through a stressful divorce (i met him during his estrangement and divorce etc). We had talked about a future together now he talks about wanting to go with other women. I am so hurt about this and confused as to where it all went wrong. Any advice?
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female
reader, sugar_sugar +, writes (12 February 2008):
"he says he no longer loves or fancies me but then at other times he shows me affection and initiates sex."
He says he no longer loves you, Just because he shows affection or initiates sex at other times does not contradict his statement of not loving you. You need to get out of this. It is over in his eyes, but he would still keep you on to satisfy his needs in those moments where he you fulfil his needs. He seems to be waiting for your permission to sleep with other women - though if he doesn't get it I can't imagine that will stop him.
He is too lazy or selfish to truly let you go, so you need to be strong enough to walk away.
A
female
reader, amber2328 +, writes (12 February 2008):
Five years is a long time but he was going thru a serious situation and you happend to cross his path at the right time. When you love someone it's hard to let go but you should not let him treat you this way. You need to walk away and let him go his own way. He will only cheat on you and walk on you if you do not stand up for yourself. You did nothing wrong it just sounds like he needs to figure himself out first.
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