A
male
age
36-40,
*rian31
writes:i was seeing a girl for 3 years and one day she says she needs a break. then she sleeps with another guy two days later. Its been 3 weeks now and i still love and miss her what can i do to get her back? if anything?
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male
reader, agony_uncle_r  +, writes (13 March 2007):
sorry mate thats a painfull thing to feel i know, been there. the fact she hit the ground running after leaving you suggests she you werent even a thought to her and she sees your relationship as one thats run its course. its cold and blunt to say it but move on and forget her, of course youll pine and feel lonely for a time but she obviously doesnt deserve your love.. find someone who doesgood luck n chin up
A
female
reader, berry +, writes (10 March 2007):
 Hi i guess you feel really hurt by this, it must be her way of saying it is over, as hard as it seems! i think you deserve more than this out of a relationship! ps also if you do go back out with her you may start to feel insecure as she may start to sleep around whilst she is with you. That isnt a good healthy basis to a relationship i am sure you know this in your heart! Move on if you can i am sure your a nice guy, take care
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (10 March 2007):
 She's told you she needed a break but I bet she's been wanting to say that to you for ages? Seems to me, this relationship has run it's course I'm afraid. She may even have been seeing this other man while you were together and only now after the "break" did she decide to sleep with him. It didn't take her long to move on so my guess is she's been fed up or bored in the relationship for a while. I know it's not what you want to hear but that's my take on it anyway.
The best thing for you to do is move on. She's into something new and exciting for her and if you start contacting her and asking her to come back you'll only come across as needy and irritating so I would back off big style and try to move on as best you can. Here's a link that will give you some tips about how to move on after a break up.
http://www.wikihow.com/Get-Over-a-Break-Up
Three years is quite a long time together but for her it seems to have gotten more habitual and stagnant than anything else. That's the reason we go out with someone and enter into a relationship with them, to see if we're compatible and obviously she doesn't think you are. Look on the positive side here... oh yes, there's always a positive side! At least you found out before you married her! If she'd went off with someone else when you were actually married it would have cause ten times more hassle for both of you! At least now you know....
Eve
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2007): You were with this woman for 3 years. You built a relationship, together. Somewhere, near the end , she felt she didn't feel the same way, anymore. Her actions have told you that. You just have to accept this, get through the loss nd move on with your life. You are hurt still and in pain. And these feelings are dictating your every day actions here and it's consuming you. Think with your brain..use your strength and resolve, and take the common sense approach. She would be by your side, if she wanted to be and you can't make her, love you again nor make her come back. Your ex gf has made her choice. Now you have to be strong, respect her choice and make your choice to move forward. Get out and stay busy with activities, friends and family. You need support to get through this. It will ease in time. Waiting around for her is a waste of time. Heal, recover and move forward. It's not easy-pain of loss and loneliness is tough to deal with and we have all been there. Hang in there, dear.
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A
female
reader, ols523 +, writes (10 March 2007):
In my opinion, the best thing to do is give it time, give her space, and see what happens. Yes, I'm sure you want to do everything in your power to get her back, but it seems like she needs that space for right now, for whatever reason. In the meantime, work on making yourself a better person, and always believe that if it's meant to be, it'll work out. There's no telling if she'll wake up tomorrow, call you up and want to work it out, or if she'll continue this behavior for months. Either way, take care of yourself, keep your dignity intact, and know that it will be okay, no matter what ends up happening. Good luck to you
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2007): It must be very difficult hearing that your girlfriend slept with someone only two days after you both decided to have a break from the relationship. Move on. After all if she was serious about you she would have waited more than a couple of days before bedding someone else. You are young and are wasting your time loving and missing this woman.
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