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A three way kiss with a guy and a girl and I has made my BF break up with me, I think. Should I get in touch with my now ex to talk things over?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Cheating, Dating, Teenage, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 January 2013) 4 Answers - (Newest, 1 January 2013)
A female United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

Hi everyone.

I'm 16 and I've been in my first relationship with a boy ever since November.

Recently I have been freaking out a bit that it has been getting very intense and he really likes me and in the back of my mind I have been panicking and asking myself what I really want.

Last night he invited me to one of his friends party's and my old friend was there- let's call him J. At midnight my boyf asked me if we could make it official and I said yes, but at this stage was quite drunk.

I went outside with one of my girlfriends and J came with and we were all talking and in our drunken state had a 3 way kiss, which then my girlfriend pulled out of and it was just me and J.

My boyfriends best friend appeared and saw us but I had to get in my taxi before anything could be said.

From the phone calls from my boyfriends friends and the general tweets/Facebook statuses I assume I'm dumped and I'm not surprised, I deserve it.

But what do I do now? Do I get in touch? Sometimes it takes losing something to realise how much it means to you.

Please don't give me a lecture, I just want help.

Thank you.

View related questions: best friend, drunk

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (1 January 2013):

I do think you owe him an apology. At the very least, that might save your reputation a bit.

The most important thing is to focus on the points other have made.

1 - Don't get drunk and go to drunken parties. This time, it was a three way kiss and it ruined your relationship. Next time, you might find yourself naked in a room doing things that you'll really regret with two people, and that'll be your reputation destroyed, and will create hundreds of other problems for you.

2 - Stay out of relationships for now. I don't think you're ready for one, and you might be better off just having fun for now.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2013):

Poster again;

I did actually kiss J properly as well, forgot to mention that haha.

Cry.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2013):

This is the poster.

Thank you for your comments, and I agree about not being mature enough for a relationship yet- I think I need to find myself before being with someone.

Just hit me that my reputation as a 'good girl' is also gone haha.

Do you think I owe this boy an apology? Should I talk to him?

Thanks

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A female reader, Abella United States +, writes (1 January 2013):

Abella agony auntHe was smitten enough to ask you to be official. That's a good sign. So I think a sweet response might do the trick.

But he's made his mind up based on hearsay and he should have shown more confidence in you. If he's young I can understand why he allowed his friends to influence him. And no doubt he was very very hurt and humiliated by his friend's accounts of what is alleged to have occurred.

He may also have been embarrassed to see the girl he thought was an angel to be in a drunken state. It might have destroyed his vision of you as perfect

How well do you know if there is any particular candy or chocolate that he likes?If you do purchase a small amount -small enough to fit inside a Greeting Card. Wrap the candy or chocolate.

Choose one of those cards with no words inside so that the only words inside are yours.

If you are super artistic you could make a card - if you are not then purchase it.

The little parcel of candy or chocolates has to be small enough to fit inside the card/envelope.

If the front of the card had cupcakes or macarons or honey or candy on the front then all the better. Since you are sweet on him still. Or if he loves fishing or loves the beach or the hills then choose an appropriate picture on the front of the card.

Then inside the card in your nicest writing write something from the heart. It can be radically different to an example below.The example below is just my version of from the heart. Your version will be different i am sure.

Dear .....

I miss you and I'm still sweet on you.

You mean the world to me and I wish we could talk about the good times we enjoyed.

And I wish I could tell you how sorry I am that we are not together.

I want a chance to apologise to you to your face. Just you and me. And ask for your forgiveness.

Whatever you have heard I would like to speak to you about the truth. And I would like to hear from your what your thoughts are right now about you and me.

Love

..........

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