A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Let just say a supposed good friend lied and screwed you over and you weren't happy with them about it. Would you...Give them the benefit of the doubt?Let them know you are annoyed at them?Not say anything about it and just move on?I'm just curious on which one people would do and why? Because i know many would give the benefit because they don't want to stay annoyed at that person. Or why they would let them know, so that the person can understand what they did hurt them and they are annoyed. Or why they would not saying anything, because most likely they don't want the hassle of an argument.Which one would you guys do?
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male
reader, zcgby678 +, writes (13 May 2011):
Let them know you are annoyed, forgive them and move on.
Don't give them the chance to produce a 'repeat offense'
That is what i would do
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (13 May 2011):
If this is a good friend they NEED to know what they did was hurtful and wrong. So I would talk to the friend and go from there.. Through it would depend on how bad I got "screwed over".. Some people are just not worth keeping as friends.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (13 May 2011):
I would lose the friend. Someone who screws you over isn't worth your time.
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (13 May 2011):
I'd not do anything about it. Depends on how the screwing about went down though, if it was in my face then I'd show that this wasn't cool right there and then. But if it was something that I found out indirectly I'd not bother to speak to them about it.
If it was a thing that perhaps could be misunderstood I'd check in with them what exactly was happening.
But other than that, if it was a friend who screwed me over I'd just let them drop. They're not worth the bother, I'd just not care about them anymore. It's a shame, but hey, they're the ones who didn't respect the friendship, and I don't keep losers around.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (13 May 2011):
If this happened to me I would
1. Know I would never trust them again because their actions demonstrate no respectfor me.
2. Continue to be non-committal and polite but they would never be invited into my home again. If they were in business they would never be given the opportunity to bid for work again with me. And if they ran a retail outlet I would never shop with them again.
3. If they had lied and screwed me over then what 'benefit of the doubt' is there to consider? They messed up.End of story. I am not a charity nor a door mat.
4. If they asked for a reference I would politely refuse. I would do the same if they invited me to their home or their function or their story. By their own actions they have forfeited the right to be my friend.
I treat my friends with respect.
I like my friends and I take great care to consider them and be respectful towards them. Lies or cheating or messing up their lives is not what true friends do.
5. I am not interested in a all systems go blazing argument. That is not how i operate. And besides my life is busy enough. There is only so much time. my life just cannot accomodate people who tell lies, behave boorishly, are disrepectful to others or break the law.
So I lose a friend. It is no loss if the person lies and is deceitful and loses my trust by their own deceitful or cruel or unking actions.
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