A
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hello everyone. My boyfriend and I have a really close relationship and we're always honest about everything. Well, this past weekend my boyfriend let me know that a girl sent him some naked pictures of herself. Which honestly I wasn't too shocked because this girl is always sending out naked pictures all the time to a bunch of different guys. I was a bit upset but we didn't really talk about it much, all he said was that it was totally random of her and that he deleted the pics, that was all. I have been thinking about it all day today and I have been getting more and more upset about it. I'm worrying what else this girl is up to and what else she could be talking about with my boyfriend. This girl doesn't sound like she has very good intentions with my boyfriend at all, she is aware that he is with me but doesn't care. She's a bit of a trashy girl I guess you could say, she's also a bit of a trouble maker. I'm concerned about this girl and my boyfriend.Should I tell him I'm not okay with him talking to her anymore? Would that sound controlling? I know she's 'best friends' with my boyfriends best friend...so this is going to become a problem if she's going to be around my boyfriend a lot or talking to him. Please help.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (20 March 2013):
You can't control other people or their behavior.
If you trust your boyfriend then that's all you need and he will do the right thing... he will delete the pictures and tell her they were inappropriate and not to send them again
if they were on skype and she asked him to look at them and he knew they were nudes and agreed anyway then he's culpable too. If she sent them without warning, then it's not his fault. BUT if he chooses to remain in contact with her he's giving her the signal that her behavior is acceptable.
A
female
reader, Red591 +, writes (20 March 2013):
No, he can't talk to her?!what is she just a "friend". I don't send naked pics of myself to friends. seriously. she is fishing hard and pathetically. I may have mad mistakes sending pics of me but it was always and only to someone i was in a relationship with. What you are describing is ridiculous and that girl needs therapy and probably has daddy issues.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi, I'm the original poster. Yes they are friends on facebook. My boyfriend said she sent him several naked pictures through a skype conversation and she wanted to know what he thought about them. It's a girl he knows through mutual friends. I don't think there was a specific reason she picked him to send the pictures because she has sent them to several people that I know. Some of them have even been passed around the internet unfortunately.
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A
female
reader, Sweetheartxo +, writes (18 March 2013):
You have to be careful over things like this, men will lie over being sent things, he couldve asked, just saying, but make sure this isnt true before getting wound up.
Seriously theres going to be loads of people that want to ruin your relationship, you have to pick things up and get over this, it was a couple of pictures. I'd be more concerned about how your man is going about this, if hes not bothered about her etc then there doesnt seem anything to worry about.x
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A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (18 March 2013):
no i don't think it sounds controlling at all. out of respect for you, you shouldn't even have to ask him to cut her out of his life. he should just do it on his own. i know if somenoe sent me pics like that, i'd just remove them from my life as that's disrespectful to who i'm with.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (18 March 2013):
so some random girl out of the blue sent your boyfriend naked pictures of her.
He's not having any contact with her at all right? not friends on facebook, no texting... NOTHING.. he doesn't even know her and has NO CLUE why she picked him to send naked pictures to.
was it email? How did she get his email address?
Was it his cell phone? How did she get his number?
was it facebook? how did she know to contact him there and that he would accept messages from a NON friend? (or are they FRIENDS on facebook)
You can't tell him it's ok or not ok to have friends or talk to folks...that's not your place.
and to be honest, if he's totally taken and smitten with you, she could dance the hootchie coo naked on his desk and he would not care... he's yours...
Men who are happily taken are not stealable.
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