A
female
age
41-50,
*izzymylove
writes:Well I soooo need help in this issue I have.My husband and I were having a great morning he walked into the living room to play with the kids and hid phone was right next to me in the bed then a text rolled in I looked at the phone becaues are friends text us on each others phone alot usually to set up play dates for our kids but any the text said" hey this is my new number for you ok bye" and it was from a women well adleast she has a chicks name so then i started looking at the texts and she texts my husband alot now he never texts her back but she is asking if he made it to work ok if he was going to some bon fire bla bla bla so I call this little girl and ask whats going on with her and my husband she was very angry and loud and soooo immature and blurted no one is F@$#% and * your husband then called me names and hung up so I went and asked him about this girl and he goes out of town alot thats what his job calls for he said its just someone who he sold his merchandise to and she probly has a little crush he also said she is just a silly kid and he said he never replies to her.well I was still very upset and confused he then took his phone went down stairs and called his bestfriend and talked for an hour instead of talking to me should I be worried
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2010): yep, be worried, be very worried. your husband did not bother to talk to you, he ignore you and made a call to his best friend. how sure are you he was speaking to his best friend? and not his new crush girlfriend? your hubby is playing and you caught him but he is not bothered by being caught. time to investigate more and please do not be foolish and think he is not corresponding with this crush. she seemed too familiar with him, don't you agree?
A
female
reader, Blonde_J  +, writes (24 June 2010):
I think you need to take a deep breath and talk to your husband again. What happened was upsetting but give him some credit. He's confiding in his friend because his friend isn't going to be hurt by whats happened or happening, and can be neutral. It sounds as if this girl is harassing him, possibly for some time and your husband doesn't know how to deal with it. The fact he didn't tell you might just be that he was trying to protect you from a potentially hurtful situation or that he thought you might react like this. The fact that you called this girl before you spoke to him about the texts, implies that there was already a trust issue there. Has he given you reason to doubt him before? If not then give him some credit now.Try to take your emotions out of the equation - if he were doing something he shouldn't, why would he contact her through a means he knows you can see? He knows you look at the messages on that phone. You need to put your feelings aside for one second and talk to him, find out what's going on and try not to panic or think the worst until he gives you a genuine reason to. Don't let some silly little girl put a shadow over your marriage. If she does have a crush that'll be exactly what she wants, and the best way to see her off is to show how strong your marriage is.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2010): If there is nothing to be worried about then your husband should let you ring her and delete her number infront of him.
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A
male
reader, TimmD +, writes (23 June 2010):
 It it was truly innocent, he most likely would have told you. Something like "Hey, this girl go my number from work and now she won't leave me alone.". The fact that he's hiding it is a little cause for concern. Is he cheating? Not necessarily, he may just be flirting with her with no real intent. Or it could be worse. Either way, it's not a good thing to keep this from you.
If you have access to the bills, just look at see how many times that number has been texting his phone. It should tell you both incoming and outgoing. Bottom line: An innocent man has nothing to hide. He should be open with you on this stuff. If he's not, it's cause for some concern.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (23 June 2010):
 This is cause for concern. I am not sure how this all happened. Did you tell him what she had said and did he comfort you at all? Did he say anything other than "she probably has a little crush on me, and is just an immature kid?" Because those things are excusing her! Instead he should have erased her number and changed his own number so that she can not text him again.
How do you know he has not texted back? Sent messages can be deleted. But before you accuse him of anything, have a proper conversation about this. Tell him you were very upset by this woman and that he has contact with her. No professional man should have private contact with his customers. What type of merchandise does he sell? Does he normally give out his private number to customers? Has this happened before?
You have too little information on this to suspect much, but you have grounds to be concerned. Talk to him. Get an explanation. Tell him you needed him to comfort you after you getting cursed at over the phone by a stranger. That was horrible what that young woman said to you out of nowhere. You have a right to know who she is, after all it is your husband she is chatting up!
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A
male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (23 June 2010):
 Do you trust him? it seems as though that's slipping a bit here. I would call her back an quickly tell her to piss off and do it front of your husband. Of he gets a bit agitated then maybe just maybe there could be a reason why but if he's cool with it he'll pretty much let you donut in front of him.
Do you know what he and his friend talked about?
Did you know you can tap his phone, it's probably very illegal but it would give you insight to comfort your heart. But he should be doing that anyway right?
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